I was always the fat kid at school, and was really aware of it. I swear I only have to *look* at a pastry for it to jiggle around on my butt! I was always too shy to try dieting or exercising because I was afraid all the 'thin people' would laugh at me if I failed. How amusing Now, I'm living alone in the city and going to university with a new wave of confidence and motivation. I've lost 10kg from the 85kg that I used to carry around, and for a while, that was fantastic. However, more and more I've been catching sight of myself in a shop window and think 'damn, is my tummy really that rotund? I thought I looked ok this morning..' I've been counting calories for about a year now, and it seems that every time I lose 5kg, I plateau for about a month, lose motivation, become self destructive and eat like I used to. Gain most of the weight back and repeat. I've got to the point where I know if I don't do something to change, I'll end up in the same pattern for years, and run my self esteem into the ground completely.
None of my friends or family understand just how much I need to lose weight ('Honey you look fine..'), if for nothing more than to prove to myself that I do have the will power to see something through, and It's really hard doing this alone. If anyone has any tips, advice or even wants to say hi, that would be wonderful