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first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

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first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

Postby watching.every.step » Thu Dec 29, 2011 1:18 am

Hi there,

My name is Ahlbi, I am a 25 year old mum from Queensland. This is my first time using this forum, or even anything simular. I have never really reached out or tried to talk to others about my big weight problems. I am hoping this will help me find some confidence and support with people experiencing simular things!

I have always been a little bit big, but it did not start being a big problem until after I had my kids. I have 2 beautiful children, 3 years and 6 years. The eldest has quite severe disabilities and though she is a wonderful and truly beautiful child my emotional eating began sometime after she was born. instead of returning to work a year or so after she was born as planned I needed to stay home with her and slowly slowly things have gotten out of hand since then I feel. In my next pregnancy I gained quite a bit of weight as well. In the last 2 years my wonderful mother and grandfather passed away, and my amazing grandmother passed also last month. Enough already with the sob story hey! That is what I have decided, 2012 is the year for me to stand up and do what is needed! So so many sad things that cannot be changed in this world, What I can change is my weight and all of the many consequences and health issues that I deal with because of it. I am almost 100 kgs at this point, I have tried lots of diet and exercise plans before but for various reasons (all my own failings) none have had much success.

I know this sounds horrible and needy, but I would so so desperately love to hear from anyone in any stage of their journey that may be willing to share their stories and feelings and and much needed advice! I cant afford any standard gyms or weight loss plans that include food and cost quite a lot. So I am trying my best to plan and prepare for this journey on my own and make the change that I so desperately need! Any advice appreciated, thank you sincerely xo
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Re: first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

Postby miss_viva » Thu Dec 29, 2011 4:00 pm

Hi Ahlbi and welcome :)

This board is a great place to get help and support from other like-minded people. I'm sure you'll find a lot of inspiring/motivational stories out there from other members who have battled their own weight issues/are still struggling with their weight issues. Jump right in and have a read through some of the articles and older posts and just start interacting with people - everyone here is really friendly and encouraging. There are also seems to be quite a few new members on here who are also mums looking to lose weight, perhaps you could team up with some of them and encourage each other!

I'm sorry you had a rough two years, but I'm sure 2012 is going to be your year! I was over 100kgs when I first started losing weight, so you're already at an advantage there :) Also, you don't need to have an expensive gym membership to lose weight, all you need to do is eat as healthily as you possibly can and try and incorporate a little exercise into your routine. Perhaps you could ask a friend/family member/partner/neighbour to watch your children in the afternoons while you go walking or jogging? When I first started losing weight, I used to power-walk for an hour or so a few times a week and that really helped. Best of all, it was free! Currently I'm really into swimming, which is great for weightloss. It's also relatively inexpensive, about $4 per visit and you can swim for as long as you'd like.

Good luck with everything, let us know how you go :) If you'd like more help with anything in particular, just ask!

Heaviest Weight: 115kgs
New Starting Weight: 84kgs
Goal Weight: 75kgs
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Location: Gold Coast

Re: first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

Postby chelsclint » Fri Jan 06, 2012 11:29 am

Hi, how are you? Firstly sorry for all your loss and heartache and secondly Congratulations for taking the first step in changing your life. Its hard trying to explain to people what its like to eat away your feelings unless they have been there before. The hardest thing is... you eat because youre down... then you get down because youve pigged out again... it really is a viscous circle.
Ive only just started the weight loss merry go round again but id love to help support you and be there if you need an ear. I hope you do not get offended but have you tried speaking to a counsellor or similar who specialises in grief and loss? I think you may benefit greatly from doing this.
I hope things are looking up for you so far in 2012 and goodluck xx
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Location: Melbourne

Re: first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

Postby SugarandSpice » Fri Jan 06, 2012 6:12 pm


I am also an emotional eater.... when I feel upset or stressed, (or just about any emotion-lol) I reach for chocolate...

I also have a disabled child (although mine is now 18) he is bed ridden at the moment and has been for the last 18 months, so I am pretty much stuck home 24/7. I also have 2 other kids 16 and 14.

I am sorry to hear about the loss of your family members. I actually have no close family - it is really just me and the kids. I do have a sister and mother who live within a few hours drive but rarely see or hear from them.

I cannot afford gyms or weight loss programmes either.. was thinking about weight watchers and then saw it is $20/week - just cannot afford that even.

Maybe we could set ourselves some "rules" regarding emotional eating? I am thinking that completely denying ourselves could lead to a binge when we are really stressed? So my thoughts are when I feel like I need to - I will allow myself a freddo frog or a mini pack of fruit tingles/mentos? That way I am not overeating, nor denying myself. BUT I am going to limit it to ONE per day maximum. That way, If I am having a really bad day and have already had a treat, I will be able to tell myself that I have already had my 'treat' and it didn't help so no point in having another?

Are you cooking different meals or same food as you would normally?
What about portion sizes?
I saw a great thing about portion sizes where 1/2 plate should be veggies (not including potato etc), 1/4 protein and 1/4 carbohydrates - i thought a really good idea would be to get one of those kids plates that have the divider already ( you know those melamine ones?)

Anyway, look forward to hearing from you.

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Re: first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

Postby watching.every.step » Sat Jan 07, 2012 1:18 am

Thank you all so much guys! In all seriousness, I can’t really explain how relieved/grateful/excited I am to hear your stories and know that there are other people out there! Sometimes things can just feel so isolated and alone.

Miss_viva - congratulations on your fantastic success! So very lovely to hear from someone who has done the hard yards already and has seen the fantastic results! I don’’t think that anyone can appreciate or be inspired by your success as much as we who are trying can. I am sure you are really proud of yourself, well done! Thank you for your lovely welcoming and support for myself. I appreciate your tips, at the moment I have been walking every afternoon when my partner comes home. This makes me late for work lol, but I have decided that if my excuse was that there was never enough time, I need to make time! I would love to hear any other things that helped you in your journey, and your experiences (good and maybe bad too?) since you have lost so much weight?

Chelsie – Thank you for your lovely response, you are so caring and welcoming. As you said, It is sad but very very true that only someone in the same position can understand the real feelings and the disastrous circle that is emotional eating! Thank you for your offer of support, I would love to share stories and be there as a listening ear or friendly support or extra encouragement for you also if ever need. As for your suggestion of the counsellor for myself, I think that is probably a very good idea. Something I have thought of and pondered before, but never really done anything about. Thank you for your suggestion!

Vicki – I share in your chocolate perils! The sweet comforter that does so so so much more harm than good! So sorry to hear about your son, that must be just so hard for you! My daughter goes to school during the terms but on the holidays there is not really anywhere that she can handle going, so we too have been housebound for a few weeks. It’s a horrible position at times, I genuinely feel for you so much and can’t imagine the stress and heartache from being in that position long term. Please let me know if there is ever anything I can do to help support you from afar, would love to be a listening ear if you ever need one. I understand also the feelings of isolation that can sometimes accompany both being a carer and being overweight. But you are doing such a good job and good on you for reaching out and taking control! You have some fantastic ideas, and I completely agree that we can plan and research and support each other here, without paying anybody!

I like the idea of allowing yourself little daily treats if needed. Let me know how you are going with that, would love to hear. I on the other hand, know that I absolutely cannot be trusted to eat just one snack a day! My problem is self control. And I am working on it. The biggest trick though for me is NOT starting. If I don’t eat one biscuit, I wont eat the whole packet. So far, so good. Time will tell.

I am cooking simular to normal, as am cooking for the rest of the family and a reasonably fussy partner (dead skinny and eats like a horse, don’t you hate that!). But beefying things up with loads more vegies and having smaller portions myself. Making sure only 1 (or none) serves of carbs at dinner, and using brown / wholemeal rice pasta wraps etc etc.

Ok, so so sorry that I am have rambled on for so long!! Just get carried away! But very excited and grateful to have met you all and super keen to hear how you are going???

Thank you!!
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Joined: Tue Dec 27, 2011 11:57 pm

Re: first time here - Emotional eater - needs help!!

Postby lmffph » Sun Jan 08, 2012 12:08 am

Hi Ahlbi,

some of the best exercises dont need fancy gym equipment. Walking, sit-ups, push-ups, squats to make a few. there's lots you can do without having to pay for anything.

the same goes for eating programmes. sounds like you're doing the same as me - smaller portions and being more conscious of what your eating.

I've been using a calorie tracker program available online. There's a few of them. the one I'm using is called My Net Diary. There's also one called Calorie King. They're both free to use (you can pay for My Nret Diary. I'm using the paid version, my partner is using the free version. We can't see the difference really!).

good luck!
Short term goal


SW - 131.5kg on 2/1/2012
New SW - 125.1 on 19/11/2012
GW - 70-80kg

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