First step - physical and emotional weight

[Bexstar]

I joined this site a few weeks ago after seeing my GP for a long time coming confrontation. I knew I had to do it but even that first step was awful. I know I'm obese. Extremely obese. But I knew only my Dr could tell me the dreaded number. So after stalling as long as I could I saw my GP who gave me the figure. It was more than I thought. It actually took my breath away. My Mum who was there supporting/pushing me asked me. I could only hold up my fingers in stages for her to add up the numbers. 213. I was 213 kgs.
So action plans put in place with referrals and blood tests etc. I left that GP appointment to go home to process. That number is stuck in my head. I can't believe I'm walking around carrying that amount of weight. I knew this was why I was constantly tired but now with the actual number confirmed everything made sense. And to say I was scared and had a melt down is an understatement.
The next step was to start moving at least 10 mins extra every day and building that up. It been a few weeks of denial but I am officially starting to be accountable for what I eat starting today. (I hate the word diet) and the movement (ugh exercise) part of the plan starts next week.
So I guess I'm hoping to use this website, in particular this forum, to address my emotional/mental support. Only 3 people in this world know my number of kgs, me, my Mum and my GP. Now I can add you who is reading this.
Please excuse the long introduction. My name is Bec. I'm 40 years old. I'm 213kgs. I'm scared to death. I hope I can find friendly supportive people on their own journey to share my journey. Thanks.

[Tams]

Bec, welcome and well done. The first step, and each tiny step is what will get you there, just one step at a time. There are others here who have lost/are losing/are maintaining large figures and have travelled from obese to normal, and we all know the mind games that come with deciding (again and again, it's a constant decision) to lose/maintain weight. Your fear at this stage is great as it is a fear of what would happen if you did nothing - so it has set you on this path. And with each moment of 'tick - I moved' and 'tick - I ate well', you will gain a growing satisfaction in yourself.

See you around!!

[Blitz]

I'm excited for you Bec!
With a large number comes the greater glory when you succeed in your journey!

We all have had that gulp moment when we realise the true state of affairs of our weight. The important thing is not to stop there but to rise to the challenge to do what we must do. The good news is that weight loss isn't dependent on whether you need to lose a large number or a small number - the process for both is the same. If you can lose one kilo then you can also end up losing 100 kilos or more. The process just needs to repeated a little longer that's all. You will be surprised just how quickly you can reach goal weight by just plugging at it a kilo at a time.

213kg is a fine number to start with...and one to look back on with a perverse pride once you have lost your weight...but the most important numbers for you to focus on are the target numbers. Where do you want to go? What is your goal weight and how much do you need to lose? If you don't know or are unsure I'll be happy to give you a recommendation (just provide me with your height - I'm assuming you are female).

I too started my exercise journey with a ten minute walk (and that was a struggle) - and by the end of reaching my goal this once 153.7kg was able to jog for two hours and still be up for more (and enjoying it no less!). My guiding rule in exercise is to always push past my comfort zone but not to push so hard that I break my body.

I again, well never referred to my eating intake as a diet. Diet gives the idea of a beginning and an end - I was all about setting up a healthy lifestyle that I could live with forever. No food was forbidden but every food was about making a healthy lifestyle choice. What I did when I started was not worry so much about what I was eating but rather how much I was eating. So what I did was literally eat half of what I would normally eat at each meal time. I was twice the size of a normal person - so I figured I was eating twice as much as a normal person. I also made sure that I ate a good breakfast to set me up for the day and I cut out all snacking. Learn portion control first and later you can start making more healthier (and helpful) food choices.

This Forum will help you in your journey but only if you use it...so use it!
Many people here can offer useful advice, give encouragement, answer your questions and most importantly - we too understand your journey because we too have/are travelling a similar journey.

We are here for you.

Wishing all success as you head towards that better future!

Kim

[DD Diva]

Hello and Welcome Bec,

You know, I'm sitting here excited about my loss this week and normally I would have gone straight into updating my profile to reflect the change in my weight this morning (Sunday is my weigh in day) BUT....I HAD TO post a reply to you first. I want welcome you, reach out and let you know that YOU'RE NOT ALONE!!! We are all here for you, and we'll help remind you that the figure of 213kg (albeit disappointing for you) is a figure that you will NEVER need to worry about again!!! I've been where you are now, we all have at some point or other, but each of us has come here, made ourselves accountable, and come out better (and lighter) for it!! At my heaviest (not shown on my signature) I was 136kg and this morning I recorded 71.8kg Mind you, I still have a way to go before I get to goal but I know that I'll get there. And I also know that YOU CAN GET THROUGH THIS, just take it one step at a time, believe in yourself and take comfort in knowing that we will be there for you (and each other) every step of the way!!

Looking forward to travelling the journey with you Bec!!
xx
Diva (aka Josie)

[Blitz]

I was watching an American program "48 Hours" and they had a story on about a young lady who had been stabbed 32 times by her ex-boyfriend and survived (just). From being near dead in emergency intensive care unit (clinically dying twice) she recovered and went back to college within the year. Graduating that year, she was selected to give the class graduation speech. The first thing she said was something very similar that I posted to you in my last post..."it is through huge struggle that greater glory comes to the victorious".

In your post you write that you "are scared to death". This is all good - make it very much a life or death matter. I know that I did.
I had convinced myself (and with good reason) that if I didn't do something about my weight...there was every chance I wouldn't see out the next year or so. My body was definitely tipping me off that now was the time for change...or else!
One of the abiding mental images I had whilst losing weight and walking/jogging was of me being chased by the grim reaper. A great image to keep you moving faster!

Exercise and food intake are important but the most important thing of all is to develop the right mind set. Weight loss can't just be a wish nor a want - it has to became a MUST!

Kim

[Rocca]

Welcome Bec, and well done for coming here and sharing your number with us. It took a lot of courage and hopefully by sharing it with us you can release some of the burden of trying to keep it a secret or pretend it's not there.
Kim is right when he said we all have to go through the same process, some just take longer. So please feel comfort in that you are not alone.
Please keep coming back in here, even when you're having a bad day. We're not here to judge, just listen and support, and it's a great way to keep yourself accountable.
You've taken some big steps already, keep moving forward... xx

[Bexstar]

Thank to all that replied to or even just read my post. I'm hoping to post in here more regularly once I gain a bit more confidence.
I've made adjusts to what I eat. My hunger seems to kick in around 8pm at night, it will plead with me to give it chocolate! But I'm hoping with starting exercise this wkend around this time of night this will help.
Luckily a lady I work with is cutting out sugar (which I'm sure I have an addiction to) so it hasn't been so hard at work. Although I did stack it off my chair which was beyond devastating.
Once again thank u to those provided support and I hope to chat with u all soon

Bec

[klas26]

hi Im new as well. Congratulations on the first step, Ive gone from being on several weightloss programs since i was 15 to lapband to back on a weightloss program... The difference is this time om doing it for health reasons...

all the best with your journey

[Bexstar]

Hi klas26

Nice to meet you! Glad to hear your journey is for health reasons as I share the same journey.
I have a dr appointment this Tuesday for blood test results. Also plan on weighing myself while I'm there for more accountability.

Wish you all the very best

[Blitz]

hi Im new as well. Congratulations on the first step, Ive gone from being on several weightloss programs since i was 15 to lapband to back on a weightloss program... The difference is this time om doing it for health reasons...

all the best with your journey

Hey welcome klas26 to the Forum!

So what is the state of play for you?
How much do you currently weigh?
What is you goal weight (how much do you need to lose)?
What things/plans are you putting into your life to achieve your goals?

You will find this Forum very useful in encouraging and keeping you accountable to your aims.
We are here for each other in this journey to a better future!

Kim

[Blitz]

Thank to all that replied to or even just read my post. I'm hoping to post in here more regularly once I gain a bit more confidence.
I've made adjusts to what I eat. My hunger seems to kick in around 8pm at night, it will plead with me to give it chocolate! But I'm hoping with starting exercise this wkend around this time of night this will help.
Luckily a lady I work with is cutting out sugar (which I'm sure I have an addiction to) so it hasn't been so hard at work. Although I did stack it off my chair which was beyond devastating.
Once again thank u to those provided support and I hope to chat with u all soon

Bec

Forget confidence...we'll provide that for you!
Jump in with both feet!
It's very human to hideaway from everyone just at the very time we need support.
It's probably the worst thing you can do...there is strength to be had in sharing our problems with others.

Don't forget this group of people are unique. We understand your problems from the same side of the fence as you.
Those that don't (or hadn't) have a weight problem can never fully understand all that it entails but we do.
All the nuances are known to us...from the tiredness that comes of carry that hefty extra weight 24/7 to the unspoken things like not being able to wipe your backside properly. Stuff others could never guess at. We are your peers.

Many of us can offer you real practical help to make your journey a success.
Use the experience gained by others to help you achieve your goals.
Don't be bashful...you have already taken the right steps - you have started posting here...keep going!

Those chocolate cravings will pass in time just persevere a little longer until your body kisses it off.
One day real soon "stacking off a chair" will just be a dim memory of your old life.
I, myself have literally broken a number of chairs in my day (and beds - and mattresses for that matter!)...don't dwell on it...
The better future is before you!

Kim

[DD Diva]

Welcome Klas26,

Ditto on everything Kim (Blitz) wrote, you're among friends here who know what the battle to get (and keep) weight off is like, are all here to support you!!!

Hey Bec,

I'm so glad Kim commented on your "stacking a chair" I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what you meant (I'd never heard that expression before). I read and re-read the paragraph especially the sentence preceding it but just couldn't make the connection between chocolate/sugar addiction and "stacking" a chair??!! I thought you were storing chocolate in the chair and got sprung hiding it in there (somehow, though if it's a typist chair, I couldn't see how this would work, but hey....)

I remember once going to a lovely little country retreat with a group of girlfriends on a "girls weekend away" and sitting on the couch (which granted, pretty old anyhow) breaking the arm of it as I used it to pull myself out of it. I nearly died!! I was embarrassed and ashamed, and I'll NEVER forget that experience!! Only wish it had embarrassed me enough to have done what I am now!!! I'd have been near goal 20 years ago now!!!

Anyway, that aside. Don't worry, the sugar cravings will subside over time but in the meantime, don't try and go "cold turkey" that's too hard. Maybe cut down, or substitute sugar for a sweetener to begin with, and then slowly cut down.

To both of you (Klas26 and Bec) a big warm welcome again, and I know you'll find support, encouragement and help in here among friends!!

[Blitz]

I'm so glad Kim commented on your "stacking a chair" I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what you meant (I'd never heard that expression before).

Never heard it before?...gosh you've gotta connect to your "inner Bogan"...

Kim

[Tams]

'Stacking it'...maybe this is a Perth/WA expression?? I understood well, but I'm an ex-Perthite! We also use words like 'wog' when we refer to a 'bug' that causes sickness (but gee, say that in the Eastern States and you're being horribly racist! They look at you in absolute horror and incomprehension).

[Blitz]

Hey Bec - how did your planned exercising go for this weekend?
I know it will seem so hard when you first start but just remember that your body will very quickly gain fitness to cope with it - just hang in there.

Win the battle of the mind.
Your mind will be telling you that you can only do so much...don't believe it...you are cable of doing more exercise than you think you can.
Just do as much as your mind thinks it can...and then just push it a little bit more (professional athletes refer to it as giving that extra 1%...the difference between being good or being a champion)...you will be surprise by just how much more you will do trying that little mind trick.

Kim