So...I dont know where to start. Im sitting here eating chocolate and drinking a massive glass of the very sugar filled Orange C. I am hopeless lol. I have tried Weight Watchers and TF but I couldnt stick to either of them. Weight Watchers I found pretty good but my will power kills me. I have been comtemplating joinging WW again now but $90 plus $25 a month...I dont know, I mean I can afford it but will it be a waste of money again? I dont know.
Im 21 and weighed myself last night. Im 147kg! Ahhhhhhh! When on earth did that happen?! How insane! I was always a chubby kid and have always been told I will never be a size 8 but even a size 22 sounds great to me right now! I have missed out on so, so much in my 21 years. I grew to just be happy been the fat, funny girl but now I have turned into a total recluse. I dont go out because I spend the whole night sitting there trying to hide the fact that I am fat. Oh mum just offered me some cheese and tomato pizza...I said sure! Arggghhh.
I dont want to be stuck in a "diet" because I know myself and if I restrict myself and say "you cant have bread or chips" ect, I will want them 10 times more. I go on and on to my family about changing our ways (I have a younger brother who isnt fat, mum and dad are average but they are all pretty unfit and unhealthy for sure) but Dad just goes on about how he was raised on chips and steak and thats all he knows and he doesnt want to change. I guess he is trying adding vegetables and stuff but If I make a stir fry, mum makes me add like a kilo of meat or dad will complain "wheres the meat?". Then when we go to eat it he says "We dont live in Asia" and complains he is still hungry afterward. When I tried to cook for just myself, mum would always say "What are you having for dinner? Oh mango chicken and brown rice? Great well and another 3294329 chicken breasts and ill make some white rice and fry some chips for your brother and dad" So it ends up been a unhealthy anyway.
I just feel like I need some help in this and this is the only place where you all seem totally awesome and inspire me so so much. I lurk all the time, you all seem wonderful.
This isnt a good intro, all I did was whinge lol. Im sorry, I just needed to get it out to someone how might, even a tiny tiny bit, understand what I mean instead of rolling their eyes coz im just been difficult lol.
Oh im Bec by the way!