hey immortal & welcome.
i'm no expert, but i find calorieking.com.au really useful with giving me direction - it takes into account your height & weight, then tells you how many calories you should be eating a day - it also has a food & exercise diary to help you track how you're going.
when you say that you're worried you'll lose the enjoyable things about life when you're trying to lose weight - do you mean you'll feel like you're deprived or something? sorry - it's monday morning & my brain is still catching up! i always find that exercise helps - if i feel a bit deprived or anything (like my bf is eating something i really want), i do some exercise and those endorphins really kick in
i'm sure other people will have some awesome advice
best of luck with the journey