My confession (for once) isn’t to do with eating too much, eating fast food or chocolate (although I’ve done my fair share & more)…it’s not even to do with not exercising when I should be (although I’m also guilty of this)…it’s to do with not respecting my body nor staying true to what it is I thought I wanted to achieve
or would be proud of.
Last night I was at my group training session, and in walks a girl who is everything I’m not! She’s blonde, slim (but not skinny), lightly tanned and, of course, yet to break a sweat.
I watched for a while from my vantage point on the bike as she whinged about doing one-legged squats (only one set!), as she struggled to do stomach crunches with a weight between her feet, as she strained to lift the smallest of weights for her leg presses and as she lightly tapped the punching bag when doing her boxing.
Now, none of these things are bad – and everyone has to start somewhere, not everyone is the same strength or fitness. However, I always said that what I
wanted to achieve was to be strong, fit & healthy and that weight loss was just a bonus that would come with these things. At my sessions, I punch that bag so hard & fast I have bruises on my knuckles for the next 4 or 5 days. I think I’m weak when I do a bench press that uses what I think are light weights, only to be told that most people have to progress through 4 or 5 other weights before they get to the weights I started with…I never complain when the trainer asks me to do anything and I never say that “I can’t"…but last night I caught myself thinking that I would have given up all that just to look like her
If you’ve read through all that, thank you! it actually feels really good to type that out and admit that i pretty much cheated on myself! I don't know where this leaves me in my weight loss journey but I think it tells me that I need to work hard on determining what my goals really are and to spend some time appreciating my body for the things it can already do - and be proud of those things!