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OMG.....what did I do??

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OMG.....what did I do??

Postby ali76 » Fri Nov 21, 2008 10:31 am

Yesterday got off to a brilliant start....after one square crumpet for breakfast (I'm working on portion control and had one instead of 2) I got ready for work and fit into a suit I haven't worn for years. I was on such a high that I left for work early and enrolled back into bootcamp. I stopped off at the most awesome bakery and bought a wholemeal wrap with cajun chicken and heaps of salad.

I was still hungry at around 1.30 so had a small bowl of special k with skim milk. For snacks, I had an apple and a museli bar. Dinner, a lean cuisine.

Not bad hey??

THEN, I lost control in a way I haven't for soooo long....I had a caramello koala (one of the big ones), 2 (albeit small) pieces of sarah lee strawberry cheesecake, a large fries and chicken burger from McDonalds (WTF, I dont even like maccas????), 2 more square crumpets and an ice cream wafer s/w (low fat....).

That mistake I can deal with....what i did next is what I'm ashamed of....I took laxatives... :?

So, at 5am this morning, I was as sick as a dog....getting rid of my binge from the night before. I did this a l-o-n-g time ago and thought I'd learnt better...WTF happened????? Where did this come from???

SW - 75.9
CW - 68
Happy weight - 68 (I MADE IT!!!)
GW - 65 (for now - and until I conceive!)
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Re: OMG.....what did I do??

Postby SarahC » Fri Nov 21, 2008 10:39 am

Sorry to hear that Ali. You know, for me, what triggers that kind of thing is when I have been good, ate well, clothes feel looser etc... I congratulate myself, then think I could "afford" to have a few extra snacks at the end of the day... then it's on for young and old!!!

Try not to let it put you off, I'm sure it's just a once off thing. Maybe your mind just needed to take a break from all the "goodness". Get right back into it today, and just forget about yesterday!

If it makes you feel any better, I had a good day yesterday, pretty damn good actually... well, up untill about 9pm, at which time I ate six (count them, six!) tins of tuna, one after the other, mixed with mayonnaise!! That's just wierd in anyone's book. Plus, I take laxatives nearly every day :oops: So... don't stress, it can always be worse :wink:
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Re: OMG.....what did I do??

Postby EvilWombatQueen » Fri Nov 21, 2008 10:49 am

Wow. Not good. I'm not talking about the junk food of course, it's the laxative abuse that worries me. I can kind of understand it, though. Once you've lost so much weight there's a temptation to avoid putting it all back on at all costs, forgetting that 'all costs' can be more unhealthy than the weight was in the first place. I know that a few times when I've thought I've gone over my calories I've been tempted to stick my head down the toilet bowl to get rid of a few of them. I've managed to stop myself by reminding myself that this is not a good long term solution and I need to find a way to stay under my caloric allowance in a healthy way. If I slip up once or twice and go over my calories it's better to put on a little weight and learn the hard way not to do that, rather than take an unhealthy way out of it and try to solve my problems through bulimia.

Maybe you're cutting your portions too much. If you're doing a lot of exercise then you need food to fuel you. Your body may have flipped out and prompted you to consume as many calories as possible. This then triggered your subconscious to deal with those calories in a way that you relied on years ago.

If you have a history of laxative abuse it might be worth seeing someone with professional experience in dealing with the problem. Even if you're sure you'll never do it again it could help provide insight into why you did it this time and why you did it in the past.

Above all I think you need to look at this objectively as a medical/psychological issue. Don't blame yourself. Guilt isn't going to make you feel any better or help you deal with it. You have such a healthy and inspirational lifestyle all other days and you should congratulate yourself on that, not beat yourself up over one bad night.

I hope your poor digestive tract is feeling better today.

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Re: OMG.....what did I do??

Postby mum2james » Fri Nov 21, 2008 5:45 pm

Sorry to hear that Ali. Atm i'm reading AJ Rochesters book "confessions of a reformed dieter"...she deals with binge eating and taking laxatives too so you might find it a helpful read. :)
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Re: OMG.....what did I do??

Postby djpeter » Sun Jan 11, 2009 2:16 am

hey ali. this incident is something i have done many times ;-(

its like i will do good, loose some weight. and then go on this eating binge and screw up what i worked so hard to lose.

i reckon this comes from some place in the brain, that when deprived, will come back with a vengeance and make you eat uncontrollably.
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Re: OMG.....what did I do??

Postby Snowflake » Sun Jan 11, 2009 10:48 pm

Ah man why would you have to take laxatives everyday??
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Re: OMG.....what did I do??

Postby Gordz » Mon Jan 12, 2009 12:34 am

wow, thats not healthy... but healthy really isn't something I should talk about.... but surely extra working out would be a better alternative to laxatives?! I couldn't imagine anything worse....
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Highest - 144.8kg

Current - 141.3kg

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3.5kg lost

31.3kg to go
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