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So Upset

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So Upset

Postby Fairie » Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:38 am

I had a huge argument with my son last night which resulted in me having 3 scotch & cokes (diet) and a small L/F chocoate bar. :( :( :(

I had lent my son the $200 to register his car as he wouldn't be able to go to work and he promised me he would give it back to me on Monday. Needless to say no money was forth coming so I began sending him texts on his phone that I needed my money. I never got any responce till last night when I said I would come and see him at work. I said he could pay it back over the next 2 payday's as I know he is on a tight budget. Anyway after may texts I was told to F**** Off, leave me alone and as far as he is concerned we no longer have a son. That really upset me as we have stood by him everytime he went of the rails.

That was when I have the Scotches and Chocolate :( :( :(

Sorry for the ramble but I'm still upset.
-Fay-

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Postby Lolly » Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:46 am

kids are horrible




that is all :cry:
Every day I am getting thinner and thinner.....


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Postby Dee » Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:03 am

This too will pass, and you have every right to be upset.

There will come a point at which you guys will have moved on from this - but until then he's gonna continue to break your heart. It can really suck being a Mum, eh?

Perhaps try just letting him go it alone in the future - if he needs to register his car - he pays for it, or he catches the bus. That way there's no dissappointment when he doesn't fulfill his end of the bargain - (as he invariably wont.)

My Mum has gone through this time and time and tie again with my sister (who's a heroin addict) and keeps picking her up, only to be shattered when Bec doesn't stay on track. I think that kids are truly sent to test us!

Hope you feel better soon,

Dee
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:32 am

oh fay being a mum is such hard work. you thought you were doing the right thing lending him the money but he has been a nasty pastie! thats horrible that u were sworn at. im too scared to swear in front of my mum! in the future perhaps make it clear that u cant afford to lend anyone money. no one has spare 100 dollar notes to give away. in the past when we have lent money to people in our family we have learnt not to expect it back at all. because we know we will never see it again. keep ur chin up fay u are a great mum
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Postby grugwashere » Thu Mar 08, 2007 9:47 am

oh Fay that sounds horrible... I'm really sorry to hear that you were treated so badly when what you did was such a kind thing.
and as for the scotch and chocolate... Tomorrows a new day!
i hope you feel better soon.
xx
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Postby Ally » Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:37 am

Fay the girls have summed it up pretty well so I won't add my two cents worth in....but I just wanted to lend you my ear too!! You will soon burn off the extra calories you took in mate....I think you did really well all things considered!
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Postby Justjudy » Thu Mar 08, 2007 11:22 am

Fay, you did really well considering the time you have been through. Keep your chin up, and start again. We all have faith in your ability to do that.

Judy :D
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Postby Vegetable » Thu Mar 08, 2007 2:20 pm

Oh hun ((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))
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Postby mary_in_adelaide » Thu Mar 08, 2007 4:51 pm

So sorry to hear your story.

But I think you should be proud of yourself that you were able to stick to only a couple of drinks and chose LF choc and diet coke even during such a horrible time. I wouldn't consider that something to beat yourself up over.
Cheers, Mary

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Postby milkyway » Thu Mar 08, 2007 4:56 pm

I think you did great, all things considered. Please don't beat yourself up. But good on you for being honest and posting about it -- I think that's half the battle. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time with your son. I can only imagine the pain you feel :( I hope things get better real soon.
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Postby slimmindown » Thu Mar 08, 2007 6:07 pm

Fay I think you deserved the scotch, that would of been heartbreaking for you.. :cry:


hopefully your son will see the light. people in my experience that get so angry do so because they are scared. When he calms down he hopefully will realise how wrong he has been and come around. Till then be kind to yourself, I know its hard. My father and I havent spoken in a long time, family rifts are terrible :(
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Postby Fairie » Thu Mar 08, 2007 6:57 pm

Thanks everyone, I did send him another text about lunch time. I didn't go off or anything I just said I do expect my money back at the end of April after he makes his final car payment. Then I said weather he likes it on not he is our son and we do love him.

As of yet I have had no reply but the ball is in his court I am not chasing him. I know he has mental problems due to excesive drug taking when he was in his teens (he's 32 now) but I will not be walked over anymore.

I am not going to give in on this I just won't hassle him and see what he does at the end of April. I can always sell his caravan that he has in our backyard if he's going to be stubborn. :wink:

Refused to give into the need for comfort food today and have only had 2 cups Jarrah Double Choc drinks and some cheese.

Tomorrow I will be back on track. :D

Off to enjoy some freshly cooked Crabs that DH went out and caught this morning. :D :D
-Fay-

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Postby kate_turner2000 » Fri Mar 09, 2007 7:10 am

good on u fay! u sound like a wise woman :) hope u enjoyed ur fresh crabs and hang tight and see what eventuates :) hugs
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Postby KimE » Fri Mar 09, 2007 8:18 pm

Fay you have done such a great job and didn't go off the deep end with your eating after the big upset from your son.


Enjoy the yummy crabs. :D
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Postby Ally » Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:09 am

Good on you Fay.....it is called "tough love" and I think you have displayed it perfectly. Kids go off the rails sometimes, but as long as they know you door is always open, then they have somewhere to turn when they feel there is no where left to go......hang in there mate, you have given him the deadline, now see if he delivers! *hugs*
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