I am so annoyed with myself. Things have been really hectic lately - I've been sick for like the last 3 weeks, and for a little longer than that we have had my bf's Dad and his gf living with us (they've moved out now). I've hardly eaten a homecooked meal in all that time. We went away for a weekend, I came back sick. I've gone to like 2 birthdays and 2 work parties in the past month, as well as other little get togethers. I have been stressed over money and just everything in general. And on top of that I've basically let myself go, stopped measuring myself, stopped watching what I eat, stopped exercising. It's like my motivation has just gone out the window. I have more cellulite than ever before, I've worn through the inner thighs of 2 pairs of jeans and a pair of work pants (that's about 2 years of constant rubbing together, they just couldn't hold out any more). I went to my work xmas party last thursday, when I looked at the photos, I couldn't pick out a single good one. Examples:
Note the double chin and flabby arms. I feel like a blimp. Being sick doesn't help - I feel twice as cruddy. I have come on here a couple of times and haven't brought myself to post anything, because I see everyone else going so well and I just feel ashamed of myself and embarassed. I just want it all gone. Everytime I set myself a goal (originally it was 'get to 60kg by my 21st - that was in July), I get to that time and extend it further. I changed it to 'by Xmas' - nearly there and nowhere near how I want to look. I have an exercise DVD but haven't used it recently because we've had a full house and I can't exactly whack it on and dance around the loungeroom while everyone's trying to watch telly. We stocked up on lean meats and lots of vegies while shopping last night - now that we're getting back into a normal routine, hopefully that will mean normal eating patterns aswell. Anyway, without further ado, here are my measurements:
Upper Thigh: 61cm
Lower Thigh: 44.5cm
Most of the measurements have stayed the same since I last measured (late October) but a couple - like my tummy, hips and thighs - have grown a few cm.
I need to find a way to stick to this. I start drinking heaps of water but then I ruin it by eating Maccas. Or I'll stay away from takeaway all week but then go out on the weekend and eat hangover food all day Sunday. And exercise doesn't even come into it. I'd love to go for a walk on the beach or something but I'm always either too busy or it's pouring rain. Stupid NSW weather. I will get there. I will stop making excuses. It's just getting the willpower. I just want to look good again.
Thanks for reading this rant, kudos to you if you got this far down the page!