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slimmindowns progress

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Postby milkyway » Wed Aug 22, 2007 5:31 pm

LOL that's the sort of thing I do at exam time :P I couldn't possibly study with a bit of mould on the shower wall...
Just keep moving! And don't be lazy...
------------------------
SW: 74.3kg - 1/1/09
CW: 71.1kg - 3/5/09
GW 62kg
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Wed Aug 22, 2007 5:37 pm

lol my oven cleaner is sitting on my bench. got it out to tackle the oven today but realised the newpaper hadnt arrived so i couldnt do it lol. something to tackle tomorrow i guess :roll:
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Postby slimmindown » Wed Aug 22, 2007 8:53 pm

i'm glad mine is done I've been putting it off for ages.
planning on cleaning the fish tank tomorrow another job I put off quite a bit, poor fishies :lol:
[no excuses, I can do it!
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Postby slimmindown » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:32 am

the last few days I've been doing a lot of reflecting....

I feel so angry at the moment, I cant believe I have been so irresponsible with food. yesterday I ate a bag of twisties and a crunchie bar for no reason. then beat myself up for it the rest of the day.


I am trying to remember how I felt back in May last year when I first started my weight loss, and disgusted was one feeling, but empowered to make a change was another.

so why have I fallen back into old habits???

I havent exercised for like, ever, I eat anything and everything, and I feel so crap because of it all. I used to have great coping mechanisms exercise and alternative stress reducers like music a warm bath ,talking to friends and posting on here, but I havent been using them. Self sabatage I know.

This is not an excuse by any means, I am responsible for my own life and I am trying really hard to jump back up on the wagon starting this very second.
I have been for a short walk and will go a gain this arvo. I am going to sit down and plan my meals for the next week so as to not have to wonder what I will eat for tea.

Mostly I am going to be a little kinder to myself and not let this hate build up inside me like it is, resulting in anger, I then push back down with food to self medicate.

I just dont want to go back to being morbidly obese :cry: :cry: and not being able to do the things I can do now.I feel so stressed and anxious inside when I think about that.

So its positive thinking and honesty from me,fo now on, and I'm quite prepared to get the boot from any one of you if I falter again. :lol:

thanks for reading my rant, I find that sometimes I can make sense of things better if I write it down. :lol:
[no excuses, I can do it!
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Postby slimmindown » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:49 am

Here is a couple of brave shots from my holiday, at the habitat park in Port Douglas,with a python and a croc. I'm hoping to be this brave from now on with my weight loss.. :lol: :lol:

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Last edited by slimmindown on Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:51 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:51 am

hey deb yap away mate, it helps i know! we will keep on your back if we dont see you here on the forum. i always find it helps me keep accountable for what i am eating. start doing a food diary here deb it really does help and if you do happen to slip up then dont worry about it we all do it. *hugs to you* you can do this deb you have done it before and you have so much to live for. :)
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Postby slimmindown » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:53 am

thaks Kate, i have taken your advice from before and got myself a food diary, i am also going to start an emotion diary so I can get a handle on my triggers and stop the binge before it starts.. :lol:
[no excuses, I can do it!
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:01 pm

wow those photos are lovely deb. you are very brave!!! that croc one is pretty scary. i cant believe how well you look. you have a glow about you :) well done on the diaries, you are taking control which is a massive accomplishment :)
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Postby slimmindown » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:06 pm

the glow was my spray tan Kate :lol: :lol: :lol: It looks ok here day 5, but for the first 3 days I resembled a chocolate frog with orange hands ,not a good look .needless to say i will never have another one. :lol:

I also swam in a water fall in the daintree which was pretty exhilirating, I was the only girl on the tour that was brave enough.

I felt very brave on this holiday 8)
[no excuses, I can do it!
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:08 pm

PMSL laughing you were very brave, not only with the snake, the croc and the daintree swim but also the fact that you got a spray tan. did you stand in a paper g string?! i want to get one done but im too embarrassed lol
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Postby slimmindown » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:16 pm

yes Kate i did wobbly bits and all, I was a choco frog all except for two whote patches under neath my heaving bust it looked quite funny when i lifted them up later and compared them to the rest of me.
I am quite fair skinned and the girl went a little over board I think, it was coming of for ages on my clothes sheets and in the shower.
My hands went from bright orange to patchy orange and then dirty looking. i dont think I would do it again. My friend also got done and she didnt look so fake, she has darker skin than me and was done by a different girl at the same saloon. Wish i had of got that girl :lol:
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:20 pm

LOL yeah some spray tans look fantastic and some dont... you must have got the raw end of the deal and the dodgy chick LOL. you are very brave.
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Postby sassi » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:51 pm

slimmindown wrote:yes Kate i did wobbly bits and all, I was a choco frog all except for two whote patches under neath my heaving bust it looked quite funny when i lifted them up later and compared them to the rest of me.
I am quite fair skinned and the girl went a little over board I think, it was coming of for ages on my clothes sheets and in the shower.
My hands went from bright orange to patchy orange and then dirty looking. i dont think I would do it again. My friend also got done and she didnt look so fake, she has darker skin than me and was done by a different girl at the same saloon. Wish i had of got that girl :lol:
:lol: i did my own fake tan at home once....i'd been living in the uk for 3 years & being pale anyway i wanted to look at least a little tanned when i went to a greek island...never again! it was patchy (looked okay in my bathroom with no natural light haha) and the water was so clear i could see it coming off as i was swimmng :oops:

but what i really dropped in to say is that i totally relate to your confusion as to why you slip back into bad habits. I do the same thing of eating something & then spending ages regretting it – just wish I could get that perspective before I actually eat whatever it is! I don’t mind if it’s something I really, really want & it fits in my day’s eating but eating for the sake of it has to stop!

I can also relate to the feeling of empowerment you felt when you first started the journey – it’s hard to keep that going when you have lots to lose like us. I’m thinking of adjusting my ticker to smaller goals, rather than my goal weight so I see myself achieving mini-goals & I’m thinking that might keep me motivated.

Good luck deb, I think you’ve done an amazing job so far & I find your achievements inspirational. I think you’ve come too far to go back to where you were, and the fact that you now re-think after you’ve eaten something is an indicator that your old behaviour is no longer acceptable to you. Focus on the positives & don’t beat yourself up too much and you will get there
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Postby slimmindown » Fri Aug 24, 2007 3:01 pm

thanks sassi, that is a great support

I think that is why I am so angry with myself at the moment(today excluded doing well so far), before it was like I was on auto pilot fat food in, no regrets more fat food in.
now Its like, this isnt me , why am i doing this??

So I have come along way from the past just have to keep going and learn from my mistakes i guess...Its bloody hard though :lol:
[no excuses, I can do it!
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Postby sassi » Sat Aug 25, 2007 12:07 am

it is really hard - especially on those days the goal seems so far away!

i also find that it's a far more emotional journey than i expected. i lost about 15kg last year and even though i was getting compliments about how i looked etc, i still didn't feel completely happy. it's a weird thing cos it somehow feels like losing weight will make any self esteem issues go away, but that's not really true.

but - i do find good habits working there way in to daily life and the exercise feels so good! i'm also finding that this time round it's making me look more closely about my eating habits as a whole and taking more notice of ingredients & things like sodium levels in food.

looks like today was a new day for you & things are back on track :)
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