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My shame File

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My shame File

Postby grugwashere » Wed Mar 07, 2007 4:57 pm

Right i have issues, as do most people but this one particular issue keeps resurfacing.... and thats Vommiting... i know i shouldnt do it..
its horrible and bad for me... i alreayd have reflux so i have no need to stick my fingers down my throat... but thats still not excuse for doing it...

i wasnt sure if i should aproach this subject on here as you are all doing so well with healhty eating etc... but today i had a healthy pasta for lunch and thennnn i went to maccas.... so my instant reaction to my binge was to throw it up... the good old "ill only do it this one last time" thing.... i dont vomit regularly just when i eat waaayyyyy to much...

so heres the plan.. every day i dont do it i get a smile and ever day i do i get a frown....


so todays score: :(
SW:91kg
CW:75kg
GW: Somwhere in the 60's for now

Next mini goal:73kg
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Postby milkyway » Wed Mar 07, 2007 5:51 pm

Hey Grug - thanks for sharing your story.

I don't think there should be any subject you can't post about here.

We are all trying to do well with our health -- mental, physical and spiritual -- but we each bring our own issues with us and have our own battles to face.

I have found that being honest with myself about my lifestyle and poor choices has been the thing that's helped me 'click' inside and get on with removing old bad habits and creating some new good ones. I don't think I've felt as determined about getting myself healthy than what I do right now.

If it wasn't for this forum, I don't think that would have happened to me.

So I hope you find this a place where you can talk about anything, without fear of judgement and safe in the knowledge that we will support you.

I've never purged (other than to kickstart what a hangover has already produced... gross!) so I don't know what advice to share or offer, other than to say that next time you feel like bingeing, come on here first and tell us and we'll kick your butt for you!
Just keep moving! And don't be lazy...
------------------------
SW: 74.3kg - 1/1/09
CW: 71.1kg - 3/5/09
GW 62kg
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Postby Dee » Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:22 pm

Absolutely you should feel secure enough here to share with us. I look forward to seeing lots of smiles.

I would advise though, that you get some help with this if you are finding you can't overcome it on your own.

Sorry, I too have never done this, although I have contemplated it many a time, so my advice may be terrible.

Dee
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Postby Fairie » Wed Mar 07, 2007 7:30 pm

We are not here to judge you Grug only support you.

If you feel like purging after you have eaten too much try to go for a walk instead to walk of the calories. If you go to Macca's try a healthier option. :D
-Fay-

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Postby kate_turner2000 » Wed Mar 07, 2007 8:02 pm

hey grug

i like dee am looking forward to seeing more smiley's. :) i cant offer u advice because i have no personal experience with that or eating disorders etc. my sister had bulimia but used laxatives instead of it coming up the other way. thanks for sharing it though, it must be so hard to come out with something like that to complete strangers. perhaps some other members can offer some great advice for you. hugs
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Postby grugwashere » Wed Mar 07, 2007 8:23 pm

Thanks so much... i do try and my bf knows about it and most of the time i resist ddoing it because he always finds out.. usually through me being unable to keep a secret...

so thanks guys for the support
SW:91kg
CW:75kg
GW: Somwhere in the 60's for now

Next mini goal:73kg
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Location: melbourne

Postby grugwashere » Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:45 am

so here goes, i have decided to award myself smiles and frowns after my meals...

Breakfast: :)

lol and it was horribly unhealthy too... oh wellim having baked beans and wholemeal toast for lunch so at least that will be healthy...
SW:91kg
CW:75kg
GW: Somwhere in the 60's for now

Next mini goal:73kg
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Location: melbourne

Postby kate_turner2000 » Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:51 am

good on ya grug- love seeing those smileys!
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Postby Dee » Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:55 am

Nice work.

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Postby grugwashere » Thu Mar 08, 2007 9:33 am

Thanks guys,

i have decided hat on top of my walking to and from the station (30 mins each way) i am going to go to the gym at work on my lunch break and ride the bike there... if i can get it to work lol....

has any one else had a trouble with their hips if they walk to much... mine are killing me ....i didnt walk from the station because of it... but i am determined to do my walk tonight!!!!!
SW:91kg
CW:75kg
GW: Somwhere in the 60's for now

Next mini goal:73kg
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Location: melbourne

Postby milkyway » Thu Mar 08, 2007 9:58 am

grugwashere wrote:has any one else had a trouble with their hips if they walk to much... mine are killing me ....i didnt walk from the station because of it... but i am determined to do my walk tonight!!!!!


I had a similar problem last year. It felt like there were shards of glass in my hips cutting into me with every step. This would kick in at about the 12km mark (I was training for a long distance hike at the time).

I thought it was all over for me, but I saw an Osteopath who sorted me out completely after just two visits. I couldn't believe it! I had a lot of tightness in the muscles in my hip, glutes and lower back which lead to tightness in my quads as well (didn't even realise they were sore until I visited the Osteopath.)

So spending $130 to fix it was a great investment, and I got about $50 back on health insurance. I've never had trouble with my hips walking again.
Just keep moving! And don't be lazy...
------------------------
SW: 74.3kg - 1/1/09
CW: 71.1kg - 3/5/09
GW 62kg
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:17 am

i havent had hip probs only when i was heavily pregnant i couldnt lay on my sides because my hips hurt that much but thats a part of pregnancy! perhaps get it checked out?
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Postby Ally » Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:24 am

Hi Grug...I know where you are coming from! I used to do the same thing...except mine was every meal, every day! I know how hard it is, but you have to get to a point where you stop before you do yourself medical damage....I know I sound harsh, but believe me you don't want to be in hospital! As I said I speak from experience and I know how hard it is not to do it......I won't post too much more about it here, but I want you to know that you can PM any time and we can chat about it if you want to. It is great that you felt you could trust us enough to fess up and you have done the right thing!! You are not alone and we can help you through it! It is great to have the system in place of your smileys or frownies! Good on you mate for doing something positive!! Keep going mate, it is hard, but you can get through it! Hang in there!
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Postby SarahC » Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:33 am

I agree, what a great idea with the smiles/frowns. You're doing so well so far Joan - keep it up!

I've only had that trouble a couple of times. Unfortunately I lack the finger in throat/vomit mechanism... it just doesn't work for me, I've tried (probably lucky that too!).

I have a friend who is a psychologist and specialises in eating disorders. She is an eternal student and has just finished of a PhD I believe. She's also been thru it herself, so she knows what she is talking about. I can give you her details if you like :)
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Postby grugwashere » Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:58 am

Thank you so much guys..

thanks Ally its good to know that there is someone here who has been through it too.. I am trying to stop it now as i am worried i will start doing it every meal... i want to be skinny but i dont want it to kill me...

and as for my hips.... i dont know maybe they are just reacting to all the sudden movement.. lol i was pretty sedentary before i started walking.
SW:91kg
CW:75kg
GW: Somwhere in the 60's for now

Next mini goal:73kg
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Posts: 852
Joined: Tue Aug 08, 2006 6:16 pm
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