I feel really proud of myself today. I have struggled with binge eating for a really long time - I'd be bored or having a bad day and I'd find myself opening the fridge or pantry and just staring at it for ages, and then eating something even though I wasn't hungry and I just could not stop. It's really awful when you feel like you can't control yourself, and then you feel even worse afterwards. But it wasn't just that, I had the worst attitude when it came to food sometimes... especially when I was home alone. I'd think "AWESOME now I can pig out on pizza and wings and garlic bread and coke..." and then I'd feel HORRIBLE afterwards and thus the vicious cycle would start over.
However, since I started on the healthy bandwagon two weeks ago I haven't had a binge. I feel so free! Every now and then when I get home after work I feel the familiar feeling of wanting to munch on things just because they are there, but I realise it is purely out of habit. Now I make sure I ALWAYS have water with me and I can now tell the difference between "real" hunger and "I'm just thirsty" and "I'm really bored". I know it's only been two weeks, but when you've been struggling with these habits for over 10 years, it feels amazing to just be NORMAL.
Thanks for reading