It is currently Wed Feb 22, 2017 4:03 am
NewMe wrote:I think you have to be prepared to be as honest as possible. Perhaps how honest you are in a relationship can be negotiated. e.g. discuss that you don't / do want to knoow about his past relationships, misdeeds etc. Make it clear if you do/do not want him to "spare your feelings' so lying in some cases are ok or not.
IMO NO lying is aceptable, but that may be due to my personal history of being used and abused by different men throughout my life. I never spare feelings either, although I do try and be a people pleaser at times. If I don't want to lie but can't say something that will not be taken nicely, then I choose not to comment. That way I am not lying.
Mind you I do think lying by ommission is just as bad as the person is not only lying but practising decit by keeping information from you.
Anyway I guess it is hard to do but as Fireball said you do need to be approachable so that men feel they can tell you things without you going off your head (not that you do!!). In the end you can only try and open yourself up to the new man as much as possible and explain your dilemma to him so he understands why you act or think the way you do about him/the relationship.
Good luck. They aren't all censored out there!!
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