There was a time in my life when I had a pretty bleak view of life. I was such a negative person pretending to the outside world that all was dandy, when in actual fact I was shattering inside. Surprisingly, I must have been pretending so well that a lot of people didn't notice. Now they can see the difference, from the real genuine positive attitude to the fake positive attitude of past; and they've commented.
I'm a self-help book addict, and a fan of positive thinking and outlook. My outlook now is definitely positive. And I'm so thankful for it. Its hard work and this is the philosophy I try to follow: a positive mind leads to a positive outlook which in turn leads to a positive body.
Don't get me wrong, there are times when negative thoughts do still cross my mind, but the BIG difference now is that I counteract those thoughts with positive ones as soon as the negative thought protrudes its ugly head.
When I started this journey, it wasn't just a journey for weight loss for me. It was a journey of self discovery. From the time I was 17& a half I experienced something that no woman should ever experience and that started my spiral of emotional eating and self hate. Slowly over the years (until I was 22) I was eating my emotions away and hating myself for it. One morning I woke up to myself and realised I hated the self destructive path I was leading. Pretending to others and especially to myself was not good for the soul. So in this journey of weight loss I've had to confront a lot of hurtful, horrible issues and every kilo lost makes me feel more powerful. Knowing that I am no longer vulnerable to those emotions in a way that will have me running to the biscuit tin and can now deal with them head on. I take time out and write my feelings down in a journal. This very action is a positive change, cos lets face facts it is something I will have to live with for the rest of my life. In part it has made me who I am today; knowing I can cope and won't break down if I allow those feelings to flow. Eating them away was just making me fat and unhappy.
Looking at other areas of my life, I've had a really positive outlook for years. I remember when I was in year 10 I wanted to get a job. My parents refused, they argued my schooling would suffer and that there was no need for me to work. Well, eventually they allowed me to work, my schooling didn't suffer (in actually fact I got a great OP), I saved all my money I earned (because my parents still gave me pocket money
) and over the years with all the jobs I've worked in I've been able to buy my very own bran new car (not so new now
), saved enough money to buy my own home and have been fiercely independent. I know what I want in life and I won't achieve it or get success unless I follow through with it and chase after it with all my might; It won't happen otherwise. I put my mind to something I will achieve it
Holly, you have it within you to change. You just got to want that change. And with every small baby step you take you will eventually get to that path in life (whatever it may be) and you'll realise you've achieved it. Big actions start with small steps. And a decision to want that change
To sum it up, I am a positive person