I really do feel for you. When you get stuck in a rut it is hard to get out. I have had all those mind games and the "why do i bother, is my life really that bad at the moment". What i have realised though is I dont have the willpower on my own, and i find it so easy to give up. So i have found a fantastic network to motivate me and to keep me focused. Id highly suggest you look into something like this.
Exercise - Group outdoor training. I go 5 days a week and i LOVE it... like LOVE it. If i miss a few days i feel low and know its because i haven't exercised. I workout with a great group of women and its similar to bootcamp but not aggressive. Look for something in your area, or get some people together and find a personal trainer.
Food - This is my biggest problem. I just love food, all food. So i have given up my right to choose for 5 days a week and lite n easy now takes care of it. Bit by Bit its starting to come off - the healthy way, no fads or shakes.
With the excercise and food taken care off. It takes the stress of me and stops me getting low and depressed that i am still BIG after 10 years of trying to loose weight. Now im loosing weight and it has a lot to do with my fantastic network.
Hope that helps!