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Postby Chelle » Thu Aug 02, 2007 9:31 pm

My nan is really depressed at the moment, to the fact that she want's to die she talk's about it all the time like it mean's nothing to her. She just wan't to close her eye's never want's to wake up plus she just want's to be with my pop. She is such a worrier the slightest thing set's her off. I've been talking to her on the phone everyday because it cheers her up & I'm going to travel down to sydney to see her next week I couldn't go the last two week because my boys have had a virus. She finally went to the doctor's today to get some depression tablet's because it's that bad. I just don't know what to do I can only do so much living far away from her.
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Postby Fairie » Thu Aug 02, 2007 11:19 pm

"Hugs" Chelle that is so sad not only for your Nan but you aswell. Can you explain to her how it is making you feel to hear her talk like that, how much she would be missed. That must be stressing you out too is there no other family that can visit or phone her? Is there no Senior Citizen Groups near her, my mum loved all the activites / outings and she made many friends there.
I have seen my son on depression tablets and I don't like them but thats just me, hopefully they will help your Nan.
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Postby milkyway » Thu Aug 02, 2007 11:57 pm

Hey Chelle- that's really sad about your nan :( I think it's great that you're calling her every day. Recently my friend's mother committed suicide. She was depressed for a very long time. She was in her late sixties :(

It's also really difficult to deal with someone who has depression as we, the average Jo, doesn't have the right/full knowledge and tool set for how to handle such a situation.

I'd suggest contacting one of the counsellors at Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 or talk to some at Lifeline - 131114 - both provide support services to people affected by others with depression and/or suicidal thoughts. They'll be able to give you some good advice for what you can do.
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Postby Maraver » Fri Aug 03, 2007 7:58 am

Depression is a very sad illness and affects so many people, if you have a broken leg or arm people can see you are suffering but depression noone can see and it can be so debilitating, give your Nan lots of love, talk to her of anything and everything, how old is she.

I never got on with anti-depressants but some swear by them.

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Postby kate_turner2000 » Fri Aug 03, 2007 9:13 am

hi chelle thats really sad to hear :( i guess i never really looked at seeing an elderly person with depression, i guess they dont tend to speak out as much about it. my nanna was lost when my pop died in 1994. they used to do everything together it was cute! however she ended up moving closer to my aunts so they could keep an eye out for her and she joined the church group who did outings, seniors group and they do outings, etc. she looked forward to going out for her day trips with her friends etc. now she isnt in good health though and cannot go out anymore as she cannot walk even the shortest of distances but all her friends she met through these organisations still pop in and have lunch with her and bring her little gifts. maybe your nan couldd take part in things like this?
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Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Fri Aug 03, 2007 11:10 am

milkyway wrote:Hey Chelle- that's really sad about your nan :( I think it's great that you're calling her every day. Recently my friend's mother committed suicide. She was depressed for a very long time. She was in her late sixties :(

It's also really difficult to deal with someone who has depression as we, the average Jo, doesn't have the right/full knowledge and tool set for how to handle such a situation.

I'd suggest contacting one of the counsellors at Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 or talk to some at Lifeline - 131114 - both provide support services to people affected by others with depression and/or suicidal thoughts. They'll be able to give you some good advice for what you can do.


spot on.

depression in older age groups is actually more common than most people think and suicide in this age group is one of the highest. Older people have to deal with the deaths of friends family and partners, increasing isolation, decreasing ability to care for ones-self or do things that make you feel like you are contributing. To top it all off, they often feel they are a burden if they ask for help.

talking to beyond blue or lifeline is a fantastic idea and you might want to pass their numbers on to her. What you are doing already is fantastic by calling her and I'm sure she understands how far away you are and knows that you would see her more regularly if you could. When you visit, perhaps you could scope out some local clubs or social groups to get her into.
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Postby Chelle » Fri Aug 03, 2007 9:07 pm

Nan is 83years old, My pop died 10 years ago they were inseprable from when they met each other the first night my pop new she was the one & asked her to marry him, but my nan said no said & it was to early & wanted to wait for a while. Eventually they maried had 4 children but my mum's twin died at birth & they took her away before nan even got a chance to look at her & never heard anything about where she is dosen't know where she is burried that is what they did in them day's in that error. Every year on mum's birthday & when I had chilren she get very upset. She whishes that they had the technology that we had today back then. She didn't even know that she was having twins until she was giving birth. I've tried to ring the ryde hospitable to find out details of what they did, but they wont get back to me about it.

My uncle use to visit nan every wednesday night for dinner & take her grocery shopping every saturday, but he accidently chopped three of his finger's off & is not aloud to drive a car yet. My mum has taken over taking her shoping on saturday's it's hard for her because she work's fulltime & she has a 10 year old son that has sport commitment's on the weekend's & weeknight's.

She went back to the doctor's today the depression tablet's didn't do anything, he put her on a small dose of vallium & she is going to see a Psychiatrist once a week. I will give beyond blue a ring tomorrow if they are opened. I tell her I don't like her talking about death but she still does it anyway.

She does have her bowling club, that she was the president to a few years ago but it got to much for her & she stood down. She goes to the outing's & has lunch with them once a week. Most of the time. But she is get's lonely. My family have done everything to make her life at home easy, like meals on wheel's, a cleaner comes twice a week to clean she dosen't have to lift a finger, she dosen't want to go in a nursing home yet. she is quit capable to live at home on her own but it's just the lonyless.

Sorry if this is so long im just answering all the question's. Thankyou for all you support. :D
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Sat Aug 04, 2007 8:45 am

thats really sad about your mums twin sister :( things have certainly changed over time. even when my sister was born in the 60's it was different to these days.

as you said its hard when you live so far away from her. my nan is in sydney too and i often get put the guilt trip on because i dont visit her as much as i should but its a long trip and with two very unreliable cars its not fair. when i get a brand new car next year and heidi is in preschool once a week i am going to spend a day each month going to sydney and taking nan out for the day. she does get depressed too because she also looks after my handicapped uncle.

let us know how things go with your nan chelle
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