WHY YOU NEVER QUESTION A DRUNK
I was shopping at the local supermarket where I
A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice,
A head of romaine lettuce,
A 2 lb. can of coffee, and
A 1 lb. package of bacon.
As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to
check out, a drunk standing behind me watched as I
placed the items in front of the cashier. While the
cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly
stated, "You must be single." I was a bit startled by
this proclamation, but I was intrigued by the
derelict's intuition, since I was indeed single. I
looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing
particularly unusual about my selections that could
have tipped off the drunk to my marital status.
Curiosity getting the better of me, I said: "Well, you
know what, you're absolutely right. But how on earth
did you know that?" The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."