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Work mates picking on my food choices

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Work mates picking on my food choices

Postby natalie » Tue Feb 07, 2006 6:16 am

Hi Everyone

I have done really well over the last year having lost over 35 kilos and I am 10 kilos away from goal.The thing is whenever I eat something that has a few calories in it my workmates say things like Oh I thought you were on a diet e.c.t....It makes me feel :oops: embaraqssed and ashamed.

It has gotten to the point where I am starting to hide my food at work and I know this is ridiculous but I guess I am very sensitive to peoples comments and what they think.

I keep telling them that I am not on a diet as this is a lifestyle change and that no food is forbiden but they still have their crappy little comments.

Has anyone else experienced something like this and if so how did you deal with it?

Natalie
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Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Tue Feb 07, 2006 6:22 am

Sounds like peole are jealous of your success. How bout saying "well I lost X kilos eating the way I am, I think I must be balancing it out pretty well, don't you?"
35kg lost. (November 2005 - October 2006)
15kg gained again (as at October 2010).
Back to the drawing board - Let's do this thing!

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Postby natalie » Tue Feb 07, 2006 7:06 am

I think you might be right....You know its like they are just waiting for me to fall but it is not going to happen.

I see the way they look at me up and down to see if I am gaining the weight back.I am not going to loose the plot now as that would be giving them what they want. 8)

I hate the emotion of jealousy...It is a horrible and ugly emotion as it seeks to undermine the other person the jealousy is held towards and I guess we are all guilty of feeling it at some stage and I know why it is a sin now...:lol:

Thanks for the good comeback line - I will be telling them next time they start.

Natalie.
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Postby Groovychic » Tue Feb 07, 2006 8:33 am

Thats right Natalie and it is the truth. You ate the way you are eating to lose those kilos before so why should you change what you eat now. Obviously your diet is correct or you wouldn't have lost the weight. Tell them that and then tell them what you eat is of your concern and not them, unless by looking at what you are eating is going to miraculously send the calories to them. Now we could see if some way that could be done!!! :lol: My mother always says to me "Do you think you really need to eat that?" Which gets a bit boring after a while! I'd always say to her, yes!!! The thing that really annoys me is that what we do with our own bodies is up to us and is of no concern to anybody else! Why can't people get that into their heads. Stop thinking about someone else that hey they are too thin and need to put on weight or they are a tad pudgy and need to lose weight. It's totally up to the individual and if they want to do something about their body they will! :x As we are all trying here. And we have people going thru the same things for the support we need. I certainly don't need support from my mother, whom is not overweight at all. I only need this forum, where everyone is experiencing the same things. And that is what's so good about this forum. We are all doing it together. Or as my partner's boss said in a speech when he had had a wee bit too much to drink "we all pull together"!!! And that evoked a huge round of laughter from everyone. He had not meant it as a joke either.......hahaha! So Natalie, just put a smile on your face and tell them that eating what you are eating helped you lose the weight you wanted to. Don't tell them you are still trying to lose a bit more weight as they will keep asking you how much you have lost. Very few people know I am trying a bit harder to lose weight.
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Postby Guest » Tue Feb 07, 2006 8:46 am

Yes you are so right.....I am not telling them nothing anymore.Next time they bring it up I am just going to say that I am happy the way I am and thats it.

yea it is none of their buisness and they are so cheeky to but in like that but I get it all the time not just about this issue but more personal things like for example kids.My husband and I have decided we dont want kids and from the looks on people faces you would think it was a sin! :lol: I keep saying having children is a choice and it is isint it? People are just sticky noses by their curious nature I think.

Anyway thankyou for your advice.

Natalie
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Postby Groovychic » Tue Feb 07, 2006 9:06 am

Yes, people want to run your life for you. It is yours and your husbands choice as to whether you want to have kids. I actually only wanted 1 but my partner insisted on having 2. And now they fight like cats and dogs!!! This will sound terrible but I sometimes think if I had the choice again I would choose not to have children. But I don't know. As much as they can annoy me, they are very loving children and life is very much more interesting with them. Some of the things they come out with are a classic!!! I have to admit as well, I really didn't enjoy the baby bit. When they got to 2 or 3 it was much better. They had become little people and could express their own opinions and concerns etc. At least you have made that decision now Natalie, instead of when you had children. My psychotic sister in law ran off and left her first husband with their children. She didn't want them. Then of course when she met my brother in law he wanted kids and so she had another 3. That didn't make sense to me. She didn't want the first 2, so she had more. I figured it out tho, other than the fact that she is a psycho woman, she loved babies. But once they could be a little independant then she really wasn't interested anymore. So I keep hoping she will run off from my brother in law and maybe he might gain some sense and stop running around with his mad face on :x . See it's even worse than that one!!!! hahaha. At least I can laugh about the situation. Which annoys them immensly. She actually said to me one day "I hate you because you are always smiling and happy". Go figure!!! Anyway I have gone way off the tangent yet again!!! So I will shut up now!
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Postby natalie » Tue Feb 07, 2006 9:21 am

Thankyou for your understanding concerning the children issue.
You know the biggest mistake people make is that they assume we dislike children because we dont want any and to be honest it could not be further from the truth.

I have never wanted children because I have never been maternal.I guess I am not one of those women that has to have a child in order to feel complete(whatever that means :lol:

We love our freedom that we have and we love our life just the way it is.I belive to have a child is to be 100 percent for the child and thats not something we are willing to do.There is more to life than just having kids and we are living it.

I am sure you are a great mum to your kids and they sound like they provide you with plenty of entertainment :lol: and yes they do come out with some pretty funny things at times.

Your sil sounds like a real looser for having kids she did not 100 percent want.I cant stand people like that and I think they should be steralised.A child deserves to be wanted 100 percent and brought up in a loving home.Unfourtunatley alot of people out there resent their kids and just because they dont say so the kids know it.Kids today are alot more feral than they used to be and its not tv violence or anything like that it is bad parenting.

Here I go off on my own little tangent now :lol:

Thanks for understanding where I am comming from anyway - its a nice change from what I usually get.

Natalie
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Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Tue Feb 07, 2006 9:35 am

I also don't particularly want children. My partner would like children sometime in the future though. I just feel that I am too independent and too career oriented and it would be too big a risk that I would be the one "stuck holding the baby" to use the phrase.

I've never been maternal and am not particularly good with children. Small children especially seem to be scared of me. Buggered if I know why. I don't mind them when they get a bit older, but little ones are exasperating and so so dependent.

The bloke's Aunt had 12 kids and when I mentioed I dont want kids she looked like the world collapsed because kids are her life. My mum always used to tell me "you say that now, but one day you'll want them" which I think is a stupid thing to say. What if I still don't want kids but am silly enough to think "gee I'd better have some cause obviously that's normal" then have kids and end up resenting them.
35kg lost. (November 2005 - October 2006)
15kg gained again (as at October 2010).
Back to the drawing board - Let's do this thing!

"You can't change the winds, but you can change the sails"

"Reach out and take control of what lands in your lap"

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Postby Groovychic » Tue Feb 07, 2006 9:46 am

No Tegan, if you don't want them then you shouldn't have them! Like Natalie said, children are 100% commitment. They come first. I haven't put myself first for nearly 11 years. I don't resent that at all. It's the way I am. And I guess even before kids I would put my partner before me and before he came on the scene, my family. I've never put myself first, and thought bugger it I'll do that because I want to and I don't care what anyone else thinks. It's not in my make up. And don't feel o poor Rochelle because it's not that at all. It's the way I am and I am very very happy. My children will always come first. If it doesn't fit with them, then I don't do it. They were the biggest reason I gave up work. I should never have started working when Ash was 18 months old. I felt so guilty(and still do) about leaving them. I missed out on so much. And you are right Natalie about kids being ferrel nowadays. And it is the parenting in most cases. People are too scared to discipline their kids. I guess I have been very lucky with ours as they are extremely well behaved kids. My son has a personality like mine, wants to keep everyone happy. Well actually wants to keep my partner and me happy and his sister unhappy at the moment. But that is typical nearly 11 year old behaviour!!!! You have to do what you feel is the right thing for you. Don't do something to keep someone else happy. I don't regret my daughter at all but I should never have been pushed into the 2nd one by my partner. And I guess that was probably one reason why I went to work, as I was doing what I had planned to do. Go back to work when my son was such an age! But there is no point living life with regrets. You can't change the past, only the future.
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Postby natalie » Tue Feb 07, 2006 10:21 am

Hi butterfly Dawn

If you dont want children then please dont have them.its perfectley okay not to want children.

If you go ahead and have them I can almost 100 percent guarantee you will regret it.You sound to much like me :lol:

You are so right about it seeming "normal" I think stuff what society thinks and you do what is right thing to do.Society has brainwashed everyone into thinking you have to have children and we get pressures from friends and family asking when are the kids comming along e.c.t. I feel totally comftable with my decision and not to mention very lucky to have the foresite to see there is a life besides kids.People keep saying to me "you dont know what you are missing" and I say to them you dont know what your missing back because its true....Hubby and I have so much freedom and we are always going away somewhere at a moments notice because we can :lol:

People say well who is going to look after you when you are older and it amazes me everytime they say it because in my opinion that is a very selfish reason to have a child.Children are not little insurance policies and besides nursing homes are full of elderley people who dont get visited by family.

People put more thought into buying a home than having a child and thats another thing that amazes me.Brining another human life into this world is the most important decision a person could ever make in my opinion but some people dont really think about it that much because as children they have been conditioned into thinking thats what everyone does.

Groovy chic you sound like a really decent parent.Yes you are right people are to scared to dicipline their kids because these days the kids have more rights than the parents and the kids know this.Your kids sound like happy and well adjusted kids and its all down to your good parenting.It really is the hardest job in the world and I admire you for it.

Natalie.

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