Sorry this is off the topic of weight loss, but it's all connected and as a member of this great forum, please allow me room to wander a bit. So I have been going great with my weight loss, diet and exercise, trying to forget that we are trying for another baby with no luck (2 yrs trying with 4 miscarriages) I have had it, I am sick of each month not getting pregnant, I am nearly 41 (so I am a bit of an old duck, no offence to other old ducks
) but we were really hoping to add just one more baby to our family of 3 kids.
Drs say its just a combination of age and bad luck, since we conceived our others really easily. So my obsession with a new baby has been replaced by my obsession with fitness, and thats a good thing. But I am again getting a bit depressed and down because I really don't think we are meant to have another baby, and that devastates me. Please don't say, be happy with what you have, as I have heard that before and believe me I am so lucky to have my family, but I hate feeling every month that we are failing.
All the baby items around just makes it worse, but I can't bare to part with them yet. I want to move forward but I am scared to let the dream go. So my rather long point is that, I just found out I am not pg again, and my weight loss is suffering. I haven't been to the gym for about a month (I went away, gym membership ran out, been sick blah blah blah), I had a month off alcohol, hoping that would make a difference, which obviously it didn't, now I am back having my wine, my bread and my cranky thoughts about poor old me.
How do I get out of this limbo I feel I am in? I know I will get back to the gym next week, because I love it, I don't want to ruin all my hard work. I hate the way I think, I wish I could just "get over it" "move on" etc but I am such a sentimentalist. I fear that I can slip back into my bad diet, etc habits if I am not careful. I just wish I could be happy. Thanks for listening.