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hate myself for my lack of willpower

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hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby sunshine » Mon Aug 11, 2008 9:27 am

I am so mad at myself right now. During the week, I do my gym, my walking, eat healthily and overall feel good about myself and what I am doing for my body/mind/spirit. On the weekends however I seem to lose that willpower and completely stuff up all my hard work and I am over it. I bet if I weigh myself today, I would have easily gained a couple, if not more kilos through three nights of alcohol, late nights, I am talking after midnight, therefore the next morning I am so tired so I don't even feel like a walk.

I always think of the weekends, meaning maybe a dvd, relax with a glass of wine, but my problem is that I can't stop at just one. I have another and maybe another then start feeling so relaxed that I give in. Consequently I think well this weekend is a no go, so I don't worry about healthy food either, maybe a take away etc. I am cranky that I don't have the motivation to keep this going, and I will not lose weight and tone up etc if I continue. So I am going to pledge in the pledge section :D something I did back in March, which is no alcohol for 2 weeks, then maybe continue from there.

I just need to give myself a good slap :mrgreen: and get things moving again. Thanks for listening.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby curvygirl » Mon Aug 11, 2008 11:22 am

I know exactly how you feel. I had a big afternoon on Saturday and didnt give a what I ate and then on Sunday cause I was feeling seedee I ate whatever. I think of all the sacrifices I made during the week and blew it all and some in 2 days. I will slap you if you slap me. :evil:
Need to get motivated.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Shalimar » Mon Aug 11, 2008 11:27 am

We can all slap each other then. I had a bit of a splurge on Saturday night (potato crisps, cheese and dips) and it has now made an appearance on the scales and I could almost cry. Well at the very least kick myself :x .
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Strawberry » Mon Aug 11, 2008 11:59 am

if you know you do this every weekend maybe changing your habit or eating better calorie choice foods earlier in the day leaving you space to have wine & take-out.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Tarz » Mon Aug 11, 2008 12:01 pm

sunshine wrote:through three nights of alcohol, late nights, I am talking after midnight, therefore the next morning I am so tired so I don't even feel like a walk.

You gotta find the right hangover cure thats all 8)
I got home sat morn at 5am slept on and off til 11am - damn pphone kept ringing had my shower my glass of berocca then kept myself busy. If you go somewhere or do something it is easier not to eat crap, you recover better then doing nothing and if that all fails, have some hairy lemon before you go out.

My weekends are also usualy pretty bad, but i think i know why, i have structure during the week, breakfast morning tea, lunch, arvo tea and dinner, exercise between 5 and 7 and no alcohol. But on weekends, wake up around 11 and theres no point having breakfast its too late, no point in having lunch because its too early so i will have whatever is in the fridge, left overs etc then still have lunch. Just need to learn to put some structure in the weekends so its easier to not stray so much.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby WaddleBottom » Mon Aug 11, 2008 12:09 pm

I find the getting mad at myself when I have something "naughty" is the beginning of the end for me.

As soon as I've had one lil tiny indulgence (the extra glass of wine, a couple of biscuits, a decadent lunch etc), I get cross with myself and my mind says "Well you've blown it now, haven't you??? You may as well just go the whole hog"... and that leads to a binge on whatever I fancy. Whereas if I stopped at that first treat, it wouldn't be anywhere near as bad.

I'm trying to retrain myself to stop giving myself such a hard time over the lil indulgences and to STOP getting angry at myself when my will power slips and to just focus on getting back on track. For me it's really a mindset issue that I need to fix.

I also really agree that weekends can be so much harder than during the week, both because of the lack of structure as mentioned and for me also because it usually means socialising. Going out with friends for lunches/dinners, going out for drinks, having time to go to the movies and munch on the goodies my boyfriend likes to buy etc. So I'm trying to take away the expectation that I'll be 100% good on the weekends, but instead trying to make the best choices I can when it comes to meals and even drinks... and limiting myself to sharing just a BIT of popcorn or chocolate, rather than feeling the need to go halves. That way I'm hoping it'll stop me feeling disappointed with my efforts, and will avoid the whole cycle of getting frustrated with myself.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Shalimar » Mon Aug 11, 2008 12:22 pm

Strawberry wrote:if you know you do this every weekend maybe changing your habit or eating better calorie choice foods earlier in the day leaving you space to have wine & take-out.



Speaking for myself I think this is only the second time in 7 months that I have done this so I guess I can't be too hard on myself :) .

WaddleBottom wrote:I find the getting mad at myself when I have something "naughty" is the beginning of the end for me.

As soon as I've had one lil tiny indulgence (the extra glass of wine, a couple of biscuits, a decadent lunch etc), I get cross with myself and my mind says "Well you've blown it now, haven't you??? You may as well just go the whole hog"... and that leads to a binge on whatever I fancy. Whereas if I stopped at that first treat, it wouldn't be anywhere near as bad.



Thankfully if I have a little blow out it makes me more determined not to do it again in a hurry.
A few years ago it was a different story though :( .
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby curvygirl » Mon Aug 11, 2008 12:40 pm

Yes I agree it is normally the begiining of the end and this I am determined not to do it. I will fall off every now and again and I Must learn just to dust myself off and get right back on. Thanks girls.
Need to get motivated.
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Mini Goal - 10 Kilos lost 14th May Acheived 2nd May, Yahoo
1st goal - 100kg 5th July
2nd goal - 90kg 4th October
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby WaddleBottom » Mon Aug 11, 2008 12:43 pm

:) I hope to get my mind set to where yours is one day soon Shalimar! I've read quite a few of your posts while I've been strolling through the forum and you're truly an inspiration.

I think for me it'll be getting those mental things to click into place that will make all the difference to making better choices for the rest of my life.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Shalimar » Mon Aug 11, 2008 2:20 pm

Thanks very much WB :D .

I think they reason I have been successful thus far is because I am well and truly ready for the weight to go. My other attempts at weight loss were half hearted mainly because I was doing for someone else rather than for myself.
I decided this year was about me and I am still as determined as I was the day I started, if not more so.
As I said the time is right for me and I think that makes all the difference :D .
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Strawberry » Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:07 pm

WaddleBottom wrote:I find the getting mad at myself when I have something "naughty" is the beginning of the end for me.

As soon as I've had one lil tiny indulgence (the extra glass of wine, a couple of biscuits, a decadent lunch etc), I get cross with myself and my mind says "Well you've blown it now, haven't you??? You may as well just go the whole hog"... and that leads to a binge on whatever I fancy. Whereas if I stopped at that first treat, it wouldn't be anywhere near as bad.

.


i'm the same. it's all about forgiving & moving on. what's done is done just make the next meals better choices.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby kiwikris72 » Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:22 pm

I know exactly what it feels like to have no willpower. I am also struggling with a lack of willpower and motivation. It's frustrating and can be depressing. I have tried putting "fat" photos of myself on the fridge which didn't work. I just looked at them and then opened the fridge anyway. I know it's just a matter of good choices, but like everyone else on here, weekends are the hardest. I too enjoy having a few drinks with friends which usually ends up with me just wanting something greasy the next day just to feel better. And there is no way I am giving up my social occassions just to lose weight.

I really liked the idea that Tarz had about keeping busy. Busy doesn't mean you have to suddenly find energy where there is none. Just potter around the house or go for a drive, something like that. I like having a good breakfast after a big night out, no matter what time of the day I finally get up to actually eat breakfast. And quite frankly this is one day a week or fortnight or however often you may socialise this way. Myself I love a good bacon and egg roll, strong cup of tea, and a DVD I have watched a million times before so that once I have eaten my breakfast treat I can promptly go back to sleep on the couch. I think what we have to remember is that this is our restorative treat and get back on the wagon as soon as possible with a good dinner that night or starting first thing next day (depending on the severity of the night before).
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Shalimar » Mon Aug 11, 2008 5:10 pm

Strawberry wrote:
WaddleBottom wrote:I find the getting mad at myself when I have something "naughty" is the beginning of the end for me.

As soon as I've had one lil tiny indulgence (the extra glass of wine, a couple of biscuits, a decadent lunch etc), I get cross with myself and my mind says "Well you've blown it now, haven't you??? You may as well just go the whole hog"... and that leads to a binge on whatever I fancy. Whereas if I stopped at that first treat, it wouldn't be anywhere near as bad.

.


i'm the same. it's all about forgiving & moving on. what's done is done just make the next meals better choices.



That's it exactly Strawberry :D .
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby sunshine » Mon Aug 11, 2008 8:41 pm

I can feel so much slapping going on in here, and its strangely comforting :) Thanks everyone, I know now that I am not the only one with this issue. As of today I am not drinking alcohol, starting off with 2 weeks then see what happens. I just keep picturing myself at the beach with the kids, and I don't want to stick out and be obvious that I am uncomfortable being there, because I am not fit. I want to feel good on the inside too. Best wishes everyone.
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Re: hate myself for my lack of willpower

Postby Strawberry » Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:03 am

Shalimar wrote:Thanks very much WB :D .

I think they reason I have been successful thus far is because I am well and truly ready for the weight to go. My other attempts at weight loss were half hearted mainly because I was doing for someone else rather than for myself.
I decided this year was about me and I am still as determined as I was the day I started, if not more so.
As I said the time is right for me and I think that makes all the difference :D .

that's when you get the best results. losing weight should never be about anyone else other than u. losing 50+ kgs would motivate u even more 2 reaching ur goal & not giving up - great attitude :)
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