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Feeling SO Horrible :(

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Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby miranda*jane » Sat Sep 19, 2009 11:18 pm

SO...I was at work Thursday night...feeling completely crap. I'd barely slept in the previous two nights, and had actually considdered calling in sick earlier in the day, but I said to myself... "No, you can do it. You need the money. Do you want to go on holiday or not?". So I did my hair, had my lunch, put on my make up and off I went to work. I was there for an hour and 45 minutes (still feeling crappy even after 2 Berrocca and some Panadol), just about to write the specials on the board, when my boss says to me "Can I borrow you for a sec?" I nod, not sure what to think and follow him.

*Pause* Some back story...I'm a bartender. It's Not a bad job, and I've only been at this particular play for four months. I few weeks ago, I got a written warning, because apparently my boss had recieved complainets about me from customers because I don't smile and look happy while I'm working and I'm slow to serve them. Which is true, I'll admit, but I was still settling in and still a little unsure of myself and my new work place. So anyway, I took what I was told and tried my hardest to improve, which I was told I was doing. I was just beginning to settle in, until Thursday... *resume*

So I follow him into the office and the other Duty Manager is sitting in another chair...my first thought... "Oh dear." My boss sits down and tells me "I'm going to cut to the chase...the hotel's decided to let you go. I don't want to, because I think you're a nice girl and took what I said and worked on it. I think you're doing great. But I'm still getting complaints from customers and duty managers. So your employment here is terminated as of right now, basically." Now...you might think, given who and how I am I would have done one of two things. Broken down into tears and begged him to give me another chance, or stand up and start yelling and screaming, call him an asshole and vow never to return to the pub, rip my work shirt off and throw it at him. But I didn't. I was too shocked. All I could say was "Yep."..."Okay." ... "Cool." ... "Thanks." I stood up, left the office, went to my locker and grabbed my bag, took my dinner out of the fridge in the bar and left the hotel. I got into my car and drove all the way home before it hit me.

I sat on the couch in my pyjamas and promptly began to bawl my eyes out. I called my boyfriend and told him...still bawling...he was upset, but not at me, at the situation. He assured me that it would all be okay and he'd help me to find another BETTER job. After many "I love you's" we hung up on the promise of lots of hugs and kisses when he got home on 2 hours. Then I called my mum (who was working at the time) and told her and began bawling again. She was saddened for me, but assured me that I'd find something new soon.

But none of that is the worst part...I feel horrible about it, yes. I'm still mortified at the prospect of not having a job again, after it was so hard to get the one I was just fired from. I'm an emotional eater, when I get depressed, I crave fatty food and chocolate. So when Aaron got home from work, that's what I did. We had Pizza Hut for tea and I had a BBQ Chicken with extra BBQ sauce and pineapple and two pieces of Garlic bread and two foccacia sticks with garlic dipping sauce. Then between us we pollished off a pack of Tim Tams. Yesterday I had two english muffins with eggs, ham and onion. For lunch I had a wheat chicken and bacon ranch footlong from subway. For tea I had two pieces of rasin rtoast with butter...but that was after I ate half a packet of Mint Slice biscuits and 3/4 of a block of Cudbury's Milk. Today I hada bowl of Just Right with fruit salad mix, I didn't have lunch, but finished the Mint Slice off. For tea we had a roast beef and veggies. I had potato and sweet potato. I ate two chocolate muffins and a handfull of Jaffas...I threw out the rest of the Cadburry's and Jaffas.

Now I feel just aweful. I'm too scarred to step on the scales, but I have my weigh in on Wednesday. Losing my job though, has gained me a few things...for one, I'm pretty much certain I've kicked my chocolate addiction. Two, I'm now more empowered to not only lose the remaining wieght, but also find myself a CAREER, not just a job to pay the bills. It might take me a while to get back on my feet, but I'll get there. Aaron is being so great about it all and doing everything he can to help me. My families great too.

I just thought I'd share my story with you all...I really needed to get it off my chest and I feel better for doing so.

That's all from me for now...

Love M.
. . . when the rich wage war . . . it's the poor who die . . .
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby jodie259 » Sun Sep 20, 2009 12:52 pm

oh M.... I'm so sorry that you've lost your job.

and it sounds like you've lost confidence and self esteem too.

I hope that you will find a better job... and you will love going every day.

It's great that you recognise you are an emotional eater - and you can't fix what you don't acknowledge (famous Dr Phil statement).
But it's not that easy to "fix" this sort of problem is it?

I only found out recently... that Medicare will pay for 4 psychological sessions. You go to a GP and get a referral... and Medicare cover the costs.
And if they think you need more... Medicare covers more. So maybe... just maybe... this might help you deal with your eating issues? (hope you don't take it the wrong way...)

It sounds like you've got great support, particularly from Aaron. And it sounds like you are fired up and focussed now. It's great that you've kicked the chocolate addiction. And I'm sure that if you can bottle that enthusiasm - you will achieve your weight loss and career aspirations.

Good luck....
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby miss_viva » Sun Sep 20, 2009 6:30 pm

Aww, I'm sorry to hear that you lost your job, that really sucks. I hope you're feeling slightly better now. I'm sure something else will come along soon, don't give up! It's nice of your old boss to at least say that he could see you were trying to take his suggestions on board and improve that way. Sometimes things just happen I guess, and maybe a new and better job will come along soon :)

If you're worried about the effects of your binge, maybe you could skip this weeks weigh in, and just focus on getting back on track for your weigh in next week. By then, I'm sure your weight will be back to normal and the "damage" will be undone. Don't give up though, because if you feel bad about your binge, imagine how bad you're going to feel if you've undone everything you've worked so hard for so far!

I hope you're feeling somewhat better now :)
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby fi_112 » Sun Sep 20, 2009 8:23 pm

That is really tough :(
at least while you are job hunting you'll have time to focus on your health and fitness routine though?
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby miranda*jane » Sun Sep 20, 2009 9:05 pm

Thanks guys :)

Yeah, I intend to work on the diet/excersize. I planing on going to the gym tomorrow...they have a couple of classes I've been looking at for the last few weeks. It's either a Body Combat class at 645pm (to get back to my martial arts...kinda) or a class they call X Camp at 10am which is apparently pretty intense...even for the fitter people... soI dunno. The X Camp might be what I need to get over the binge...but I might not be able to move for the rest of the day...and I'm doing the resume thing tomorrow...no point waisting time...
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby Daisybeck » Sat Oct 31, 2009 8:58 pm

miranda*jane wrote:SO...I was at work Thursday night...feeling completely crap. I'd barely slept in the previous two nights, and had actually considdered calling in sick earlier in the day, but I said to myself... "No, you can do it. You need the money. Do you want to go on holiday or not?". So I did my hair, had my lunch, put on my make up and off I went to work. I was there for an hour and 45 minutes (still feeling crappy even after 2 Berrocca and some Panadol), just about to write the specials on the board, when my boss says to me "Can I borrow you for a sec?" I nod, not sure what to think and follow him.

*Pause* Some back story...I'm a bartender. It's Not a bad job, and I've only been at this particular play for four months. I few weeks ago, I got a written warning, because apparently my boss had recieved complainets about me from customers because I don't smile and look happy while I'm working and I'm slow to serve them. Which is true, I'll admit, but I was still settling in and still a little unsure of myself and my new work place. So anyway, I took what I was told and tried my hardest to improve, which I was told I was doing. I was just beginning to settle in, until Thursday... *resume*

So I follow him into the office and the other Duty Manager is sitting in another chair...my first thought... "Oh dear." My boss sits down and tells me "I'm going to cut to the chase...the hotel's decided to let you go. I don't want to, because I think you're a nice girl and took what I said and worked on it. I think you're doing great. But I'm still getting complaints from customers and duty managers. So your employment here is terminated as of right now, basically." Now...you might think, given who and how I am I would have done one of two things. Broken down into tears and begged him to give me another chance, or stand up and start yelling and screaming, call him an asshole and vow never to return to the pub, rip my work shirt off and throw it at him. But I didn't. I was too shocked. All I could say was "Yep."..."Okay." ... "Cool." ... "Thanks." I stood up, left the office, went to my locker and grabbed my bag, took my dinner out of the fridge in the bar and left the hotel. I got into my car and drove all the way home before it hit me.

I sat on the couch in my pyjamas and promptly began to bawl my eyes out. I called my boyfriend and told him...still bawling...he was upset, but not at me, at the situation. He assured me that it would all be okay and he'd help me to find another BETTER job. After many "I love you's" we hung up on the promise of lots of hugs and kisses when he got home on 2 hours. Then I called my mum (who was working at the time) and told her and began bawling again. She was saddened for me, but assured me that I'd find something new soon.

But none of that is the worst part...I feel horrible about it, yes. I'm still mortified at the prospect of not having a job again, after it was so hard to get the one I was just fired from. I'm an emotional eater, when I get depressed, I crave fatty food and chocolate. So when Aaron got home from work, that's what I did. We had Pizza Hut for tea and I had a BBQ Chicken with extra BBQ sauce and pineapple and two pieces of Garlic bread and two foccacia sticks with garlic dipping sauce. Then between us we pollished off a pack of Tim Tams. Yesterday I had two english muffins with eggs, ham and onion. For lunch I had a wheat chicken and bacon ranch footlong from subway. For tea I had two pieces of rasin rtoast with butter...but that was after I ate half a packet of Mint Slice biscuits and 3/4 of a block of Cudbury's Milk. Today I hada bowl of Just Right with fruit salad mix, I didn't have lunch, but finished the Mint Slice off. For tea we had a roast beef and veggies. I had potato and sweet potato. I ate two chocolate muffins and a handfull of Jaffas...I threw out the rest of the Cadburry's and Jaffas.

Now I feel just aweful. I'm too scarred to step on the scales, but I have my weigh in on Wednesday. Losing my job though, has gained me a few things...for one, I'm pretty much certain I've kicked my chocolate addiction. Two, I'm now more empowered to not only lose the remaining wieght, but also find myself a CAREER, not just a job to pay the bills. It might take me a while to get back on my feet, but I'll get there. Aaron is being so great about it all and doing everything he can to help me. My families great too.

I just thought I'd share my story with you all...I really needed to get it off my chest and I feel better for doing so.

That's all from me for now...

Love M.



You got fired because you don't smile at customers??!??

Your ex-employers sound like a pack of mongrels. And the clientele they have sound like elitist snobs.

This thread makes me soooo mad. I worked for a horrible pack of people a few years back. They were rude, arrogant and condescending and weren't above talking down to me in front of others as a way to make themselves seem......I don't know what they were trying to achieve, I guess it made them feel better about themselves to belittle someone else publicly. I tried my hardest to deal with them in a patient and mature manner and they had the gall to fire me in the end. Their reason? They said I was great and had brought a lot of innovation to the job but they found someone else with more experience. They never even indicated I did anything wrong. Incredibly, the more patient and genuinley nice I was to them, the more it seemed to annoy them. It was mind-boggling.....

I will never forget getting fired from that job and the sudden horror of knowing I no longer had an income. On top of that I had credit card debt, a car loan etc etc.....

I immediately started applying for new jobs and was extraordinarily lucky to land one straight away and I'm still in that same job just over two years later. My current employers love me just the way I am and all my performance appraisals are wonderful.

Unfortunately we live in a world where you can't always expect people to do the right thing by you. There are some downright nasty characters out there who seem to have bugs up there arses for reasons known only to themselves.

Miranda*Jane: My darling you just hang in there. And you have no business beating yourself up over what you've eaten. So you're an emotional eater? We all are and it just goes to show that you actually HAVE feelings and emotions. Unlike some people out there....... :evil:

And I promise you another position will come up. Just believe it will happen, and it will. :wink:

End of my rant,

Daisy.
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby Aylilth » Sat Oct 31, 2009 10:20 pm

Hey,

I'm still new here but just wanted to say forget the old job!!!

They sound just awful, and the customers as well. I've wrked retail/food service and while yes we are supposed to "paint a smile" seriously we all have days. Plus as you say settling in as well.


Pffft on them, you were too good for them, maybe they were just jealous of you :wink:


And don't worry about the binge eating sh*t happens, you realize what you've done stopped and are going to make up from it. We learn from our mistakes, and you've just learned a lil more.


Hugs. :mrgreen:
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby miranda*jane » Sat Nov 07, 2009 9:46 am

Aw...thanks guys...

And guess what...I got a new job :D It's at Subway, and much to my own amazment, I love it. Seriously. I actually WANT to go to work. It's the best I've felt in ages. So thepays dropped b $5, but I'm getting more hours, therefore actually getting paid more for doing something I like. Who'd have guessed I'd like making sandwiches for a living lol.

Honestly, I'm so much better now. Thanks so much for all your post, stories and encouragement.

I just found out that the place I worked for, fired to more people after me. One girl was really great. She was always nice and new her job. The other lady was a hag. No one liked her at all and I actually think she was the reason I was fired.

But anyhoo, feeling better now. Thanks though, for all your kind words, I appreciate it :D If any of you are in Whyalla, drop in and say hi hehe :D

<3 M
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Re: Feeling SO Horrible :(

Postby Daisybeck » Sat Nov 07, 2009 2:55 pm

That's awseome hon! There's nothing worse than horrible employers. Best of luck in your new job and with everything else. :)
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