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what's your downfall?

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His non-diet kills mine

Postby Annie » Tue Jan 10, 2006 8:54 pm

Hi guys,

My biggest downfall is my man - he hates it when I do anything remotely diet-like and goes totally ballistic if i say i just want a salad or don't want something he's made coz it's fattening.

He says it's coz he likes the way i look now and didn't like it when I was skinnier, but I need to lose about 6-7 kg to look my best again.

Any tips on how to deal? i love him but i don't want to keep feeling bad about how i look just coz i have to give in to him to keep the peace.
Annie
 

Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Tue Jan 10, 2006 9:03 pm

Have you sat down and explained to him how you feel? He might not understand why you are wanting to lose weight and not realise how much it means to you. It sounds like you need to make sure he understands that it's not a criticism of him or that it's any threat to your relationship. And I'd thank him for loving you no matter what your size too - that's hard to find and he'd probably love to have that acknowledged.

there are a whole range of reasons why he might not want you to lose weight. The first step is to find out precisely why and then work around that issue. Just make sure he knows how important it is to you and make sure you listen to his concerns too. They may be valid ones.
35kg lost. (November 2005 - October 2006)
15kg gained again (as at October 2010).
Back to the drawing board - Let's do this thing!

"You can't change the winds, but you can change the sails"

"Reach out and take control of what lands in your lap"

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Butterfly_Dawn
 
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Location: Hobart, Tas

Thanks

Postby Annie » Wed Jan 11, 2006 6:58 am

Thanks Butterfly-Dawn, I'll try to pick a time when he is in a good mood and have a chat.

xx
Annie
 

Postby Tas » Wed Jan 11, 2006 8:07 am

My biggest weakness is chocolate and biscuits. But luckily I have found some lite bikkies with less than 1 gram fat. So every day I intend to have 1 in the afternoon (found them yesterday). The funny thing is I didn't want one yesterday cos I knew I could!! I'm weird I know :lol:

Annie - it must be hard for you - but I sat down with my OH and showed him in figures just how much I was over-weight and what it could be doing to me. Once he saw it in writing he agreed that I needed to do something about it now. He was also a few kilos over weight and he joined me on a low fat diet. Just at the right moment show him/tell him that it is in your and his best interest for health reasons to watch your diet and to exercise and tell him it means a lot to you for his support. I also told my OH that under no circumstances was I going to enforce any food restrictions on him. I have even made him a nice dinner low fat of course and he thoroughly enjoyed it - I didn't even tell him it was low fat LOL

I'm sure once he realises that it is not going to affect your relationship he will be fine.....men...ya just gotta cajole him in to believing it was his idea :lol:

Good luck

Maria
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Tas
 
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Joined: Mon Oct 24, 2005 8:40 am
Location: Tasmania

Men!

Postby Annie » Wed Jan 11, 2006 4:09 pm

Hey Tas,

Yeah, you're right.
I think his main issue though is that he likes the way i look with curves and I don't. I like your idea of edging him towards a healthier mentality... and your proof that it worked on your man.
Keep up the good work... and the great suggestions!

:-)
Annie
 

Postby Tas » Wed Jan 11, 2006 4:22 pm

Yep Maire - my OH loved the extra *bits* I carried around with me too - but now he joins in the excitement of actually noticing an improved figure and vitality! Why wouldn't he? :lol:

Keep it up and keep cajoling him - he'll be right.

Cheers
Maria
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Tas
 
Posts: 303
Joined: Mon Oct 24, 2005 8:40 am
Location: Tasmania

Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Wed Jan 11, 2006 4:29 pm

I guess I must be lucky - my bloke is quite encouraging for me to lose weight - not that he's not "impressed" by my body now :wink: . But with just the weight I've lost now he get's even more "impressed". Every time he sees me nakie he says "gee your bum looks smaller these days" or similar. I don't know if he actually thinks so or whether he got such a good reaction the first time he just keeps saying it!!! :lol:
35kg lost. (November 2005 - October 2006)
15kg gained again (as at October 2010).
Back to the drawing board - Let's do this thing!

"You can't change the winds, but you can change the sails"

"Reach out and take control of what lands in your lap"

User avatar
Butterfly_Dawn
 
Posts: 4151
Joined: Thu Nov 03, 2005 10:28 pm
Location: Hobart, Tas

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