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No support from family

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No support from family

Postby JL77 » Sun Sep 02, 2007 7:31 pm

I went to my relatives for fathers day today. Each time we go there are always munchies out and they cook so much fatty food its not funny. Of course I ate a fair bit as I always do at family functions. I think thats part from boredam and part because it is there.

I was talking about how much weight i had put on and how I was unhappy. I got a few little comments but then later during the day I was sitting on my lounge after pigging out so my stomach was pushed out alot and my nan who is not small at all said I had put on alot and asked if i was pregnant. Ohhhh my god, my sefl esteem went from to 2 to zero. Then mum had a say and she is not small at all. Infact not to be nasty but her gut is huge.

I feel so ashamed now :?

Starting Weight 20/1/08 ~ 86kg
28/1/08 ~ 85kg
2 /2/08 ~ 84.2
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Postby kate_turner2000 » Sun Sep 02, 2007 7:36 pm

hey jez the thing is is that you are doing something about your weight. you know in yourself that you dont like being the size that you are and you are doing something about it. snide little remarks definately dont help and the first time around that i was losing weight i didnt tell anyone because i didnt want to hear the comments especially at family gatherings. try and block out what they say, a lot of it is jealousy and they dont like the fact that you are doing something about your weight and when you do have low times and eat more than you should then that gives them a reason to knock you down for it. just say 'thanks for your comments i am doing something about my weight and would prefer it if i kept it to myself'
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Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Sun Sep 02, 2007 8:26 pm

people always feel the need to meddle don't they? There was one customer at the bakery I used to work at who used to constantly tell me I shouldn't lose any more weight. Like it was any of his business. And the people who always tell you about the latest diet :roll:

But no-one can make you feel bad without your permission, so don't let them!
35kg lost. (November 2005 - October 2006)
15kg gained again (as at October 2010).
Back to the drawing board - Let's do this thing!

"You can't change the winds, but you can change the sails"

"Reach out and take control of what lands in your lap"

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Postby shelbel » Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:19 pm

Oh yes, the people who feel the need to put in their 2 cents worth, be it family, friends or work folks, there is always someone with a opinion about your weight! You may find when you start to get results it will be these people who try to feed you more food too!

I think Kate has hit it on the head with just saying, 'thanks for your imput', and off you go. There may well be alot of people who try to bring you down on this journey, but that is their problem, and not yours and while its easy to say dont let it bother you, sometimes it will, you just gotta rise above it and remind yourself why your doing this, and that this is for you and know one else.

I hope you can get back on track and take heart from what the girls have said, let us know how your going!
Highest Weight - 93kgs
Current Weight - 68.3kgs
Goal Weight - 65kgs

The wise man Stephen King once said - The only way to go on, is to go on. To say 'i can do this' even when you know you cant

You'll find me in the almost there section :)
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Postby JODI C » Sun Sep 02, 2007 11:20 pm

Hey There,
Dont worry to much about them I know this is a little different but when I was at a family function a few years ago I was eating carrots instead of the usual cakes and stuff and all the family thought it was funny and were teasing me about it but they got the shock of their lives when only 8 weeks later I had lost 11 kilos so they had to eat their words it just made me more determined to succeed (pity the weight has crept back up on me now) but thats the reason im here :) :)
I will succeed!! I really can do it!!
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Postby esoteric » Mon Sep 03, 2007 6:58 am


I know how you feel it hurts even more when it comes from family, they are the ones you expect to find comfort in. I read it once that you cannot give what you do not have.

It feels like crap when people say those things to you. I am in Egypt and to them saying you are fat is something it seems normal for them to say and I had a number of times someone asking if I was pregnant. If I was pregnant for being fat then they need to open their eyes I would think everyone is pregnant except the kids and young unmarried ones and few at that. lol

Sorry for being negative about others here in Egypt but people can be so rude.

I am 87 kilos right now too. I hope to make it to normal sizes one day in the next couple of months. We will make it and show them where they can put their words (((mad laughter))).

Keep on trying we can make it I have seen many transformations here and the people are so supporting and uplifting. I hope to see you around more often.


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Postby vanessa0305 » Mon Sep 03, 2007 7:50 am

I have to admit that the reason I got so determind to lose the weight was because of family.

My hubby had to go away for work and stayed with my parents while away. While there, he had a conversation with my parents about how to put me on a diet without hurting my feelings. For some reason this not only hurt but made me really mad. So I got started and every time I slacked off I remembered the conversation and it made me mad again and I would dig in and keep going. A few weeks later my parents came for a visit. The conversation came up and my dad says "honey you're taking it out of context, we were talking about how fat women are sexually unattractive!" So that kept me mad for a few more months!! eventually the weight loss became about me and my needs and wants but to really keep me motivated at the beginning I only had to think of those harsh words.

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Postby Butterfly_Dawn » Mon Sep 03, 2007 9:02 pm

:lol: at your dad. people can be such idiots "no honey we weren't saying you need to lose weight, your fat rolls just make your hubby want to heave" LOL gee thanks dad. :roll: :lol:
35kg lost. (November 2005 - October 2006)
15kg gained again (as at October 2010).
Back to the drawing board - Let's do this thing!

"You can't change the winds, but you can change the sails"

"Reach out and take control of what lands in your lap"

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Postby yummymummy » Mon Sep 03, 2007 11:33 pm

My father has the need to remind me whenever Im eating to much or the wrong thing- it drives me insane!! esp when its on special occasions like xmas day or a birthday. Rightly or wrongly now I usually bring it up before him with a 'look dad Im eating far too much cake & I may actually explode!!' it usually shuts him up-bless him :?

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Postby Jisgone » Mon Sep 03, 2007 11:59 pm

when i first saw my aunty after losing about 30 kilos she said oh u look good, youve got a long way to go tho
do they think we dont know this? like we dont own a mirror or scales but they know everything!
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Postby ali » Tue Sep 04, 2007 9:03 am

Good on you for losing the 30+ kgs Jewels, thats fantastic. People tend to focus too much on the negative side of things. Instead of looking at how far you have to go, they should be praising you for how far you've come! Ive only got 9kgs to lose and I feel like i'll never get there! So good on everyone for losing! Its so hard, and sometimes ppl just dont understand.

My sister is like that, not mean, she just doesnt understand. She is a nutritionist but still! :lol: When we went to see our family she said at the table that she doesnt feel sorry for people with diabetes because its there own fault for not looking after themselves - definitely the wrong thing to say at a table full of overweight ppl with diabetes! So my aunty spoke up and said, "well, Im trying but it is hard!" And then my sis felt really bad, but she has been skinny all her life and doesnt know the first thing about weight problems! Grr. And now she is starting a job at this new weight loss place for tf shakes, and she's asking me how many cals you should consume a day! Lol. :roll: :lol:
GOAL 1: 59KG - 30/12/07
GOAL 2: 56KG
GOAL 3: 53KG
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