Hi Guys and Girls
New to the forum, coming in with mixed emotions. I have been down the weight loss road before, I lost about 35-40kg in 2006/2007. Started to regain mid 2008 and now here I find myself a whole wardrobe of clothes that don't fit, becoming increasingly unhappy and so beyond disappointed in myself I don't think I could ever truly be able to express it in words. <y goal weight is 80 kilo0s. My dream goal weight is 75 kilos. My lowest weight in the last three years is 86 kilos. It still astounds me I got so close to my goal, but not quite there! I am also 6ft2in. So very tall, hence why my goal weight may sound high!!
I guess my first road block I haven't yet been able to overcome is getting on the scales again. I have it in my mind that I am somewhere up around the 110kg mark. My heaviest ever I have weighed in at was just under 140kg. I think what scares me the most is if I get on the scales and its alot higher than I think. I have literally been trying to talk myself into 115kg being ok, but I am petrified it is going to higher than that. I guess I have joined this forum and started a thread so I feel accountable for my actions. I know exactly what I need to do and how to do it, I just can't break the mental barrier.
I am also in fear of the work. I have been there and done that. I know how hard it is. I don't know if I can do it again. It takes dedication and strength, and I don't know if I have it in me.
So here I am, I can't face the numbers but I need the numbers so I can get to work, and so progress can keep me motivated. I know I am going to be a blubbering mess when I see it. I vowed I would never get over 100kg again, and yet here I am.
Food Diary for today -
Speciak K Honey Almond, rev milk
2 Salada Biscuits
Small turkish bread, chicken snitz, lettuce cheese tomato
2 cinnamon donuts + 1 very small slice of chocolate cake (Birthday at work) (excuses!)
1/2 Chicken breast schnitzel and a packet of low fat 2 minute noodles for dinner
Low fat ice cream and strawberries for dessert