Hi there all. Been reading the forums for a while and I decided I might as well make a profile and go here for extra support. Specifically as I do definitely have more than 10kgs to lose -.-.
Essentially, I had always been overweight since I was 11 years old. I'm now 23.
I am the youngest of three sisters. The two older ones always been in good shapes are both gorgeous.
Essentially, I've had depression since I was 13. I also suffered sexual abuse from my biologicial father when I was 11-13. (I have not seen him since 13).
In highschool I was still gaining weight but eventually at around 16-19 I weight about 75kg. I look back now and I looked fine. Yes I was overweight. But I was a size -12-14. I never had any trouble fitting in to any shops or clothing shops back then. I was happy. And I look at the photos of me back then, and I looked beautiful.
What happened then was I moved out on my own and lived and worked full time in a horrible job for 2 years on my own. I went from 75-78kg to 130kgs.
It was horrible.
Eventually after 2 years in the city, I was forced to move home as my job refused to let me go to part time to study (i got into an illustration course). When I got home. I decided that I couldnt live like this and started to eat healthy and exercise. I lose about 10 kilos in 4 months. It was slow. But I was ok with that.
Then sadly I got phsyically and sexually assaulted. which resulted in a nervous break down and eating disorder.
Dropped down to 93kgs in less than 2 months. (I do NOT recommend nor am I recommending it!).
In the last 2 years, it has been constant mental and body battles. But now I am at a stage of being tired of being overweight.
I gained 12 kgs back last year, 3 of which I've lost already.
And as of tomorrow I'm going on lite'n'easy.
I've been seeing a nutrionist who says this will help my body get back in portion control properly etc etc.
So now, I weigh 103kgs.
My first official goal is to be 75kgs. Technically for my bmi, I should be at least a minimum 68ks. But I feel like I will fall up short if i expect myself of that in a years time.
My first true goal, is to be under 85kg so I can be lighter than my boyfriend.
I am scared but excited. Scared of failure because I have failed so many times.
But this time, I cannot fail. I cannot afford any more horrible damage to my body.
I've survived childhood cancer, abuse, assault and depression.
If I can survive all those horrible things. I can do this.
Sorry for the long wall of text. But hopefully I can achieve this goal in 12 months. wish me luck!