matchbox's progress 2

[matchbox]

OK girls i have to admit it.... I NEED TO GET MY ASS KICKED i have been SO lazy and unmotivated, and while i was going relatively ok for a little while, my mum had a huge bake up last night that means muffins, cookies etc. and they taste good. not fair!! i know that being holidays doesnt help either. i have no routine any more and to be honest i'm quite bored already! work is giving me hardly any shifts (2 short shifts last week and NONE this week!! COMPLETELY unimpressed!!) which means i'm not doing a whole lot apart from bumming around at home, going out, and seeing D. And when i can't see him i'm bored out of my brain! and really, clenaing my room is the last thing i want to do

I NEED TO GET BACK ON TRACK

I'm going to write a list of some of the reasons why i'm doing this and hopefully it will help:
to look hot
to feel more comfortable in my bikini in summer
to look gorgeous on my birthday, and to have great pictures from it! i don't want to look back on them and cringe, and know i could have put more effort in, but didn't because i was lazy.
to be a bit more toned - don't want flab everywhere - i want some muscles!
to not be completely embarassed when D and i go bike riding
to be fit and not out of breath when i do littler things.

so in short - gorgeous, fit, strong. i know gorgeous probably shouldn't come first, but hey, if that's what's going to get me there.....

SO i need a plan of action. i want to do something different, that i haven't done before but i'm not sure what. any suggestions

While i'm undecided, i think i will go to yoga tonight. i just need a kick up the ass really. i have noone to be accountable to, noone to go to the gym with, and i am nowhere near as overweight as i once was. i am getting to complacent where i am and am thinking that i don't need to do any more since i've already lost so much weight, but i WANT to and NEED to, i can't just leave it now. i mean sure i have lost a bit of weight, but i'm not toned, or fit at all, and i'm still quite flabby. i want to look HOT. I know my boy loves the way i look, but sometimes i wonder if i could make him just go I want to look gorgeous standing next to him! I want his friends to think that he did the very best, and picked someone so fantastic for him, i want them to think i am perfect for him! sorry if that sounds really lame.

[Amethyst]

Doesn't sound lame at all. I want the same. You're closer to it though. I know you can do it

[matchbox]

thanks amethyst glad it's not so lame

[MissMinx]

I'm sure your bf is so over the moon for you and for what you have achieved.

And as for you young lady, you should go and look in the mirror and tell yourself you look like a million bucks NOWADAYS compared to before! think of how bad you felt in the past about your weight..!!!! I know I hated my starting weight of 71.5kgs...omg so disgusting, so when I do have a bad day now I try and think to myself its nowhere near how I felt back at my starting weight so better not mentally torture myself over it, it can only get even better.

Chin up babe.

[EvilWombatQueen]

You can do it, Lexi! You're on uni holidays now so you can really put a heap of effort in. You've just got to want it!

I agree with MM. You're already gorgeous, fit and strong. Just because you want to get even MORE gorgeous, fit and strong doesn't mean you can't love your body right now!

[Czarina]

Your boy obviously already thinks you are hot stuff! But I can understand where you are coming from, I want to be the best I can be for my man, too, even though he loved me all the same when I was obese!

I know I hated my starting weight of 71.5kgs...omg so disgusting

MissMinx, I know you didn't mean any offence by what you said, but it might be good to be a bit careful of how you put things, as there are people on the forum who do, or did, weigh a lot more than that and might feel a little hurt or discouraged...I know you would never intend to come across in a negative way, you seem like a lovely person!

[MissMinx]

No this is exactly what i meant by my comment... I PERSONALLY felt disgusting at that weight I hated myself for it and yes i understand there are ppl out there in far worse situations, I acknowledge that but for me personally I hated myself for getting that far and I did something at the time to stop me from being even bigger than that!!

[MissMinx]

lastly, its ALL relative to me and the type of life I want ! I being the key word.

[matchbox]

hey ladies, thanks for all the lovely comments, they are really greatly appreciated you don't know how much i love reading them

unfortunately after my big spiel/rant i just got further off the wagon. i've realised that i punish myself for things other people do to me, and i have to learn not to do that. i am a very strong person however i am VERY shy and have trouble sticking up for myself, so instead i take it all in and end up feeling worse, and eating more too.

tomorrow i am going to try and get up for yoga, not sure if it will happen or not, if i decide to go back to bed then so be it, i'll see how i feel in the morning. not doing so great today unfortunately.

more later xx

[MissMinx]

Hey chicky,

You just have to take control of every situation and forget about how other ppl make you feel....just take care of no.1 being you, dont take it to heart!!

Its hard not to get affected personally and then you end up turning to your weakness being food...I do the same! I give in too...we're only human and we can learn to take other better avenues to get us through...e.g. go punch a punching bag or somethin hehe

Yoga...hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i've never done it before. I'm not really into classes or whatever...maybe I should try getting a yoga dvd and giving it a go at home one day. Does it really work your body out nicely???

[matchbox]

its been ages since i've been on here. am sick at the moment so not doing anything except taking it easy really, i've been in bed the last 2 days not doing anything. i've done no exercise all holidays either. i'm annoyed at myself for being so lazy and not doing anything, i NEED to do it, and i planned to do it on the hols. being sick just makes me feel so crappy, can't wait until i feel better, although i guess i will have to take it easy until i'm feeling better. having some probles with the bank and stuff lately ARGH i hate them!!! i can't wait until it's all done with and over, i am SO over it!!! i also got a couple of massive bills that i wasnt expecting, so the stress of everything has taken its toll feeling very sorry for myself unfortunately

[EvilWombatQueen]

I don't blame you for feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you've had a real run of bad luck recently. I hope things get sorted out at the bank, that your bills get paid without too much pain, and that you start feeling better soon.

*Hugs*

[matchbox]

i'm back into it as of... well 2 hours ago. cutting down the crap food, trying to avoid eating after dinner unless i'm actually hungry, and not sweets jsut because i want something sweet. off to the gym tomorrow morning, and will take it from there. i've started another thread in the challenges section, "MATCHBOX'S 3 MONTH CHALLENGE" because i have 12 weeks until my birthday, to get to my goal weight and looking and feeling hot and toned! incentive is not only my birthday, but also a new very exxy bikini that i want (hopefully without boardies!)

[MissMinx]

Nice one matchbox (by the way do you call yourself matchbox bec u love matchbox20 ?? I do so i had to ask hehe).

I'll join that thread too as i'm in the same boat 12 weeks here I come!!!

Whats for your afternoon snack today and dinner tonight?

Mines an apple and tonight is a white egg omelette with capsicum, mushrooms, parsley, low fat ricotta cheese sprinkled, and pepper...it will contain 6 egg whites in total. I plan to have a cucumber salad afterwards just to keep me going as the omelette can be very light.

MM

[matchbox]

hey MM, yes thats exactly why! I am a HUUUUUGE fan and can't wait to see rob when he comes again in feb hopefully i will get to meet him this time!!
sorry i only just saw this so i don't remember haha... however i still live with my faily, so i eat what they cook (or sometimes i will cook, depends on when everyone is getting home, when i get home, uni work etc) but i normally cook once or twice a week. Tonight being saturday night, i'm not sure what i'm having for tea - don't know if i'll be eating here or going out with the boy for tea yet (we're last minute planners drives my mum insane)
For snacks i LOVE tiny teddies - they're really good for uni, and i like those mini sakata's too - we just get those little sharepacks and i can just throw them in my bag - don't get time between classes to go and get stuff, and a lot of it is junk anyway. however saying that on wed the boy and i have a big break, so we went and got nandos last wed

what do you normally have for brekkie?

also... weighed in at 59kg this morning woooo!